Confused???
By dhangski
@dhangski (3194)
Philippines
April 28, 2008 2:19am CST
I had a heart to heart talk with my friend last night. He is from Jordan. I really felt sad for him. He doesn't know what to do. He was about to go to India to pursue his studies on Hospital Management, he is working as a nurse. He really wanted to do it, it's his dream. Last April 25 he was scheduled to go, then all of a sudden, it didn't push through, He had a discussion with his mother, coz his mother doesn't want him to go. After that heated discussion, his mother had an attack of hypertension, she was even hospitalized because of that. And I feel pity for my friend, he really felt bad about it. I told him that he should understand his mother's feelings about him being away from the family. But I do understand his feelings too coz he waited for this opportunity all his life.
If you were in this situation, what would you choose? your family? your dream? what good advise to give to a friend who's in this situation?
2 people like this
10 responses
@johndur (3052)
• Pasig, Philippines
29 Apr 08
i think your friend should not discuss things with his mother he should try to tell her the good things that is to come when he go to india.he should not argue with his mom,he should have done it politely and carefully.and besides parents shold not hinder what their kids wanted to be.im sure he is already of legal age and should living on his own.he should have told his mother everything when have left for india and not before going to india..for now he should wait for his mother to get well and tell her that what he is doing for his future and for his mother also...
@dhangski (3194)
• Philippines
29 Apr 08
Thanks for the response. My friend is of legal age, and he had discussed everything to his family about his plans. He was shocked that when it's time for him to go this happened. He is now taking care of his sick mother. And I told him to be calm, be patient and wait for the time that he can discussed about this to his mother.
@neildc (17239)
• Lapu-Lapu City, Philippines
29 Apr 08
i was in that position before, almost the same situation of choosing between my dreams and my family. i here i am, i survived. i guess your friend should do is to take care of her sick mother first. during this time, he can slowly motivate her mom, what is he really for, in leaving her for awhile. by the time her mom's condition get fine, i guess that will be the time to continue his journey to India...
@chiyosan (30184)
• Philippines
28 Apr 08
i sure understand how his mother feels about it, but he should not feel bad about losing his opportunity if he chooses to be with his family, after all his dreams too are for his parents right? other chances will come to him if he does truly love his family and understands the situation his mom is going through.
@lucy02 (5015)
• United States
29 Apr 08
Well I don't know about his mother but I remember when I was going away to college my mother would fake being ill to get me to stay. She is bipolar and I contributed some of her behavior to that. I think he should go. This is his life and he has to live it. I'm assuming she is not critically ill or anything. If so that would be different.
@Madona1 (2096)
• Gibraltar
28 Apr 08
Oh, it is a very tough decision. Family is important for everyone and it normally comes first. But in this case, career and the future are more important. For your friend whose dream is to study Hospital Management, which will not take more than 4 years, so the leaving is temporary rather than long term, it should not be a big issue for the family. Especially, during the summer/winter vacations, he still can visit his family. His family should be proud of what he is going to do and support him. Maybe your friend’s mother need some advice and comfort to clarify the situation.
@lishiwei (1550)
• China
29 Apr 08
It's really to have a decide.I also don't know which I should choice.But I think I'm so luck that my parents always respect my choice.
But I think he can have a discussion with his mother so that he can make his dream come true without broken with his mother.Do you think so?
I think we so young that we should catch as more chance as we can so that we can have a good life in the future and it's also a good thing for our parents.So I think they will understand us then.
@julyteen (13252)
• Davao, Philippines
1 May 08
i always go with my mother what she want. my mom now is also suffering hypertension and often experience mild stroke sometimes if she attacked she can't walk for almost a week. i am very lucky that my mother is still surviving until now. i know time comes she won't recover anymore and i am always praying not this time. i love my mom whatever she want i will give her.
@longbangod (1785)
• Philippines
28 Apr 08
Hey this is a very good topic. I commend you for being so concerned with your friend.
I think, he needs to weigh things out. He needs to really set his priority. When he will decide to go, with a very good explanation to his mother, its possible that she will understand.
Though this time wherein his mother is sick I think its better to stay. If I am to choose from my dream and family? I would choose family. Since they are part of my dremas also.
@vikrantkarning (42)
• India
28 Apr 08
Ya normally most of the person experience such type of situation in their life,when it comes to choose family or carrier. I think his mother is too possesive for his son that is why she is not leting him go. your freind should try to make understand his mother that how important for him to fulfill his dream for the betterment of his life. if he step backward because of the mother then he have to regret for the whole life. And I dont think that any mother would like that his son would go under deprression for whole life because of her. afterall she is a mother and she will make understand. Yes I think your freind must stick with his decision.
@carolluvyou (460)
• United States
28 Apr 08
well it is a hard decission but if this is his dream to pursue something then i think his mom should understand he wants to make something of himself
