Why am I so scared to get my life back on track?????

I felt the same way when I left my abusive boyfriend. I was so terrified of trying and failing. I just had to look at my baby and know that I had too there was no other way about it. It will get better in time. I know it doesn't look that way. I think when our self esteem is shot and our confidence low our world and life seems pointless. Just know that your babies need you to be strong for them now more than ever. They are looking up to you to come in and be their superhero.

When my marriage broke up I was terrified. Me, usually so strong and independent! It's scary to start a new life but you know it must be done for your own sake as well as your childrens'. Let a little time go by--you'll be frightened and have some bad moments but it gets easier, believe me. The freedom that you have now will sustain you! No more emotional abuse, no more being afraid of saying the wrong thing, no more fearing for the safety of your children. This will make you strong! You are wise to get a home of your own, someplace where you and your children can have some privacy and begin to open up to each other and heal from all those years with your husband. You're doing the right thing!

cream, well this is normal for you to have these feelings at this time. It is very scary to start all over by yourself. I know this because I did it myself 2 times myself. I started over with nothing. Yes, Your hubby does have you brainwashed into thinking you can not make it, my ex-partner had me feeling this same way over 10 years ago.But once you really put your mind to it and have your fill of this man, you will see that you are better off, and that where there is a will there is a way!!And since you have not worked in years and do not have an income, this makes it even harder for you, but please do not let this bother you. You will make it, believe me.I know you want to leave your grandma's house as she is not in the best of health.But thank god she has been there for you in your time of need. And I am sure she would rather you be with her than with that man.You will get your own place very soon, and everything will fall into place, do not get discouraged. Never go back to this man.Get a job any place to make ends meet if need be, but make it on your own. You can do bad by yourself!!It will take time, it will not happen over night, but you will see, your life will be so much better in the near future. God Bless you my Dear Friend!!

I believe your doing the right thing. However, you need to prioritize your situation especially since you have children. Try getting a job first to help you and your children first. Than save some money for apartment for deposit and first month rent. Afterward get settle in your house and take care you home.

Change is hard. It may be harder for you given that you are leaving abuse behind. Mental abuse also takes longer to recover from. It chips away at your self-confidence. Take your time. You will get back into the swing of things.

Girl you've got to press on. You need to remember who "You" are, you're a mother first and you have a responsibility to your children. Just because there are people around you that want to pull you down doesn't mean you have to let them. I think you've been pulled down enough. Fight for your survival, your kids will thank you one day for giving them hope. Don't revert to taking care of somebody other than yourself, be selfish just this once and realize no one is going to take care of you. You will make it if you try, if you fail at something don't give up. Quitting is easy, let your kids see a survivor and they'll get more of an education that school could ever teach them. Guilt is when you've done something wrong, since when is taking care of yourself and your family wrong? Its never wrong.

When one has depended on another person for a long time it is scary to be out and alone having to make all the decisions and having all the responsibility. Your a very smart lady so don't give up You can do it this. Just take it one day at a time.Yes it was difficult to move out from your grandma's house but you have to move on. Just take your time and don't jump into another relationship for at least 2 years. What ever you do don't let your husband know and make sure your family doesn't let him know by mistakes. You need to find out just hpw strong you are and that you can do this.

You just have to take things one day at a time. You can handle this, but it can sometimes seem overwhelming. If you just focus on the thing to be done next, it will be more manageable.

It may be the natural case with you. a swe all know about the problem you are going through in life. its very natural. but gather courage to move forward in life. there is no way.

Hon, I've been there...granted it was a long time ago. But I remember how scared I was and how hard it was to be alone again. I had to do everything alone. It was hard. I always paid the bills every month and cleaned the house and took care of the children. That was a given. It was just being alone and not being beat on or being put down everyday that I had to get use to and working to pay the bills alone. Sleeping alone, which was okay with me. But it's so hard not having someone not cussing at you everyday, hitting you and calling you names and telling you that you aren't worth anything everyday anymore. Now don't get me wrong these are good things, it's just something that you just have to get use to all the good things going on now.. these are the things I had to deal with. I know things will get better. This is a good thing. Something that will take some getting use to as well. Just as the abuse for years it will take some time getting use to the good things that are going on now. Mind you it won't take that long to get use to the good things. It's easier to get use to good things than it is the bad things that you dealth with for years. It's much nicer with the good things too. Just keep reminding yourself that this is for your children and you! And that you all deserve this! Don't see him alone,(the ex) and make sure you tape any conversations you have with him. If he gets out of the way with you cut off the conversation right away. Do not deal with anything he puts out thats bad, you don't have to...he is out of your house and life now! He can not hurt you and your children now if you don't let him anymore! You don't want that anymore.... You want to be happy and healthy... Brace yourself...you can be...you are going to be! You deserve to be happy!

Stop listening to the voices in your head questioning whether you can make it on your own. You really have no choice in the matter. You know you are capable of getting your life back on track. Take one step at a time and show your kids that you are self sufficient and don't need anyone to take care of you. You can do it, you just have to believe that you can.

It can be very scary stepping out on one's own, but you have to learn how to stand on your own for now. You have to be strong and tell yourself that you can do it, and set goals for yourself and your kids. Show your kids you are strong, as this will help them later on. Also do this to show your kids you are trying to give them a good life. I hope things work out for you, and you get the happiness that you deserve.

You are not doing anything wrong by getting out on your own. Don't let others make you feel guilty for doing the right thing for you and your children. They need their own space as do you so that you all can get a good nights sleep. You are old enough to be out on your own and taking care of your family with no feelings of guilt. It will be hard especially after being a house wife for the last couple of years. You can do this you have family and governmental help available to you. Once you are moved in and living your life for you and your children you will know it was the right choice.

My sympathy is with you. You been through a lot of hardships in life. But the good thing is you are slowly trying to get your life back on track. I will pray for you, that your courage may not fail you ahead. Good luck, you can do it. I have faith in you.

It is quite natural for anyone to think likewise and at times getting confused. But I think you had no option. You seem to be more worried for your children than yourself which portrays a great image of yourself. I believe with some extra effort you can manage to overcome all hurdles. Wish you every success.

i think at some stage we have to be able to let go and get up on our feet... i know that it is really scary but you just have to do it at some stage... i wish you all the best and hope you can rebuild your life again after leaving your abusive husband... take care and have a nice day...

Hi cream, [i]There's nothing wrong in your plan..So just want to give a comfortable place for your kids and at the same time, you want your grandma to have a relaxing environment free from any noise...I know that you can do it, that is just a normal feeling I believe since for 2 years, you're dependent to your husband as far as finances is concern! but, I know like other single mom, you will make it! You just need to be very strong which I know you are and continue praying for HIS guidance..HE has a very wonderful plan for you and those trials are just temporary![/i]

Hi cream97! I think you are on the right track. You are concerned with your grandmother's health that is why you decided to move out. I think that is nothing to be guilty of. You fear moving out because you are finally on your own. It is very difficult for the first few days and maybe weeks but just hang on there and be committed and firm with your decision. Be strong my friend! You have been able to take so many steps already and I think you can still go on to take more steps for you and your children. Just believe in yourself! Take care always..God Bless!

Good day...If you need to move out in order to move on then you should go. You shouldn't feel guilty or bad because it's not like your abandoning your grandmother altogether. Just promise her you'll get in touch and check up on her from time to time and you're just a phone call away. I think she'll understand.

you are afraid of failing my friend.Dont be afraid of that because that is a part of life.We all fail and make mistakes but the important thing is that we pick ourselves back up and keep trying until we get it right.This is the difference between success and failure.It's natural to be nervous but we must overcome that and fight our fears.You will be so glad you did in the end.Good Fortune!