Love vs arranged marriage
By mansha
@mansha (6298)
India
November 5, 2006 3:57pm CST
Should marriage be arranged by parents or should youngsters get married to their own choice?
8 responses
@xxclairexxj (590)
•
5 Nov 06
I think an arranged marriage is an outdated, rediculous idea. People should get married to who they want and only if they want to! Who is anyone else to dictate how you shoul spend the rest of your life and who with? What is the benefit anyway? People should make their own choices so they can be happy and if they're not happy at least it's down to them!
@mansha (6298)
• India
6 Nov 06
But sometimes we are too youg to decide. I asked this because two of my cousines got married to guys who could not support them financially and they had to change their life style completely due to that. Life became a struggle for them and they realised it too. One's hubby tried raping her sister one day, I really felt they made a wrong choice as they were too young just 18 when they fell in love, and got married at 21.
@briennekb (610)
• United States
13 Nov 06
Why would anyone want to have their lives decided for them? How is is possible to be your own individual if you let everyone else decide for you? I just cringe at the thought of letting someone else dictate my life. Actually, I don't have to cringe because I would never let it happen.
@saq786 (733)
•
13 Nov 06
I would say marry for love. That way you choose the person you want to be with.
Some arranged marriages are done for the benefit of the family. Like the marriages between royalty hundreds of years ago - it was done for alliances, not because they actually fancied each other. If they did, it was a bonus.
And I guess it also depends on the culture of the people. Maybe women are taught not to speak up and just do as they are told, and marry who they are told to marry. I'm not sure what country it is, but I have heard of people not meeting their husband/wife until the day of the wedding. And I think in those cultures, you are encouraged to stay married, so maybe they either try to work things out, or just learn not to complain about anything.
In terms of which one would last longer, I guess it depends on the people in the marriage. If you have a system and it works you will stay together. If you marry for love, as long as you communicate with each other, then I say it would last.
@angel_1202 (129)
• Canada
13 Nov 06
Own choice, definately. While some arranged marriages can turn out good, and the wife and husband actually love each other, it usually just doesn't work out that well. But with all the divorces going on in this world nowadays...I just don't know.
