A Challenge Met........well I hope! LOL
By Sparks
@sparkofinsanity (20471)
Regina, Saskatchewan
February 4, 2009 10:45pm CST
As some of you know, I was challenged by our favorite bella of chaos to write a short piece of fiction in the style of Dr.Suess with a Texan flair.
Now I'm Canadian. And I'm old. What do I know of Texas and what do I remember of Dr. Seuss books? Very little. But I offer you the following anyway, and I promise you it's all mine, written right out of my little brain alone, and the best I could come up with.............I'm sure a real Texan could do 'er gooder! LOL
Sam, I am, a Texas man, not a Mexeecan!
Ya'll are fixin' to give me a lickin'
'Cause I kin speak, Texan Greek.
I kin ride a horse an' I tawk rawt
But yew varmits here know it not
And I cain't git work, even when I flirt.
My daddy were a cowboy and my Momma loved her man
When along came a Docter with a hat like a rocker
And turned me in to
Green Eggs and Ham!
I hate them thangs, gives me cobra fangs
But I'm a rich'n Cat in my rocker hat
Crooked as a snake with the cramps in a lake
And flat as a fritter, ya'll git on with yew
Twitter, twitter, end of litter!
Do I pass? Would YOU take me for a Texan? I woudln't. ROFL
11 people like this
23 responses
@thebohemianheart (8827)
• United States
5 Feb 09
Barb, I was born and raised in Texas, and native Texans do pretty much pronounce things that way. I'm not saying we use some of the terms and words, but pronunciation was pretty damn close.*L*
5 people like this
@sparkofinsanity (20471)
• Regina, Saskatchewan
5 Feb 09
Apparently yew have ter be REAl country to sound like this! LOL Or something like it anyway. My kids never had the Dr. Seuss books, more's the pity or I'd have had some around. They jumped straight from See Spot Run to Hardy Boys! LOL
7 people like this
@bellaofchaos (11538)
• United States
5 Feb 09
Hmmm ...I think you passed!!LOL ... You did a very good job hun and I'm proud of you.. For writing in a type of style that is insane and trying to use Texan talk.. LOL!!! I think I would have wrote a discussion saying I give. LOL!! Very good my dear and you have won. No more challenges for a while.. OK a week. I'll at least give your brain time to recover. I know I know I'm evil.
5 people like this
@bellaofchaos (11538)
• United States
5 Feb 09
All I have to say is Dontcha know. eh.
3 people like this
@bellaofchaos (11538)
• United States
5 Feb 09
goodnight hun I have some serious napping to do!!! Dontcha Know,eh
3 people like this
@sparkofinsanity (20471)
• Regina, Saskatchewan
5 Feb 09
LOL, Well I do know that for all his talent Dr. Seuss was born and bred in Massachusetts so I bet he'd have had a hard time with 'Texan Greek' too! LOL
And yes, you are evil, and yes my brain needs a break! ROFL It was fun though, but I think I'll stick to good old Canada speak from now on!
6 people like this
@sparkofinsanity (20471)
• Regina, Saskatchewan
5 Feb 09
And I'm not sure I should have! LOL
2 people like this
@novataylor (6570)
• United States
5 Feb 09
Wow, Sparky, talk about steppin out of y'all's comfort zone!!!!! You know what I mean. So, did you have to shake it off after you finished it so's you could feel normal again? Damn, girl, good job!!!!
4 people like this
@sparkofinsanity (20471)
• Regina, Saskatchewan
5 Feb 09
LOL Nova, no wonder Texans wear big hats............they must have massive headaches all the time! ROFL Nice to see you. I've offered to write a flash fiction piece in my own style for Bohemianheart about her skirts and the brown brogues from the piece I wrote for you. Would you mind? I rather thought it might get the two of you dancing here together again........
3 people like this
@sparkofinsanity (20471)
• Regina, Saskatchewan
5 Feb 09
Yes Bo, you'll be barefoot, I'll be in brogues and Nova in her famous Red shoes! LOL
3 people like this
@thebohemianheart (8827)
• United States
5 Feb 09
But, I want to be bare foot. Please? I love dancing around barefoot!
3 people like this
@thebohemianheart (8827)
• United States
5 Feb 09
*LOL* That wasn't half bad, Sparks!
Nice job!
4 people like this
@sparkofinsanity (20471)
• Regina, Saskatchewan
5 Feb 09
Does half bad mean half good? LOL At least no one was liftin' there skirts! ROFL
5 people like this
@sparkofinsanity (20471)
• Regina, Saskatchewan
5 Feb 09
LOL, just couldn't work in Sam in a skirt! Racked my brain trying to though! I was thinking of ya! ROFL
4 people like this
@thebohemianheart (8827)
• United States
5 Feb 09
Not half bad means you did good, Darlin.
I was a little disappointed about the skirt thing.
3 people like this
@sparkofinsanity (20471)
• Regina, Saskatchewan
5 Feb 09
Well my fritters are still flat, and I'm supposed to call them 'pancakes' which seems rather tame! LOL
2 people like this
@sparkofinsanity (20471)
• Regina, Saskatchewan
5 Feb 09
That's what I thought too, but some of areas of Texas claim 'flapjacks' is a Yankee name for them! LOL
2 people like this
@Darkwing (21583)
•
5 Feb 09
That's good, Spark!!! Whether it sounds perfect Texan, I'm unable to tell you because I haven't come across many in England and am not totally familiar with the drawl, but it sounds pretty reasonable from what I have heard. Well done!
Brightest Blessings, my friend.
@sparkofinsanity (20471)
• Regina, Saskatchewan
5 Feb 09
LOL, I haven't found many Texans in Canada either! Thanks Darkwing.
4 people like this
@sparkofinsanity (20471)
• Regina, Saskatchewan
5 Feb 09
Close the barn door Sally! ROFL
4 people like this
@olivebranch56 (910)
• United States
5 Feb 09
Fraid not Sparks, but perhaps some of my mountain kin folks, up in North Wilkesboro, NC, Moonshine capitol of the world, LOL. The would take you down to the crick and wosh them ther Green eggs and ham right ofin yer skin. Then u's smell gooder nuff to marry your Uncles, cousins, momma. Hugs Marilyn
@sparkofinsanity (20471)
• Regina, Saskatchewan
5 Feb 09
Last night after I posted this I finally did a web search (wasn't allowed to do it before hand) about American 'dialects' and you wouldn't believe how regional and complicated Texas accents and speech are! It's amazing!
2 people like this
@sid556 (30959)
• United States
5 Feb 09
I would give you a passing grade on this...it is good...really good actually. Still, i find myself thinking it sounds more like a country song than a dr.seuess. it isn't shabby at all......i will grade you a c. Your cat and the hat is great but geared to adults more than the kids. Would you like them on a train? No sam, I'd not like them even in the rain. I do not like green eggs and ham, samI am.
3 people like this
@sparkofinsanity (20471)
• Regina, Saskatchewan
5 Feb 09
LOL, I'm not mad sid. But the terms of the challenge were that it be Texanized in speech and Dr. Seuss in format..........which was really hard to do without pictures! LOL And as the audience here IS adult, and the 'story' was not be a rehash of a known Dr. Seuss book, it came out the way it came out! LOL
3 people like this
@Rosekitty (19368)
• San Marcos, Texas
6 Feb 09
I live in Texas and hear talk like that everyday..i am so glad i don't since its one thing about Texas that annoys me..too much Texas twang..now I'm half Greek so could that be that i'm Texas Greek too?
3 people like this
@sparkofinsanity (20471)
• Regina, Saskatchewan
6 Feb 09
LOL Yep! And knowing that explains a LOT! ROFL
2 people like this
@leenie50 (3992)
• United States
5 Feb 09
Well Daffy,
I'd say those words you writ wernt so daft. You did good girl. I'm glad it was you and not me trying to write those texan words. I can't wait to see how she liked it. Thanks again for your help on my computer. I'm starting to make some headway.Hugssss
leenie
3 people like this
@sparkofinsanity (20471)
• Regina, Saskatchewan
5 Feb 09
Thanks Louie. I hope you get all your probs sorted soon. There's nothing more annoying than an unco-operative computer! LOL
2 people like this
@tamarafireheart (15384)
•
5 Feb 09
Hi sparky,
Lol! that was brill, I don't know much about Texans either but I I reckon you'll make a great Teaxn gal in your rocker hat smiling like a great big cheshire cat. You write a book about it. Love and hugs.
Tamara
xxxx
3 people like this
@sparkofinsanity (20471)
• Regina, Saskatchewan
5 Feb 09
I'm Canadian West, not American West Tamara! LOL I couldn't write a TexWest book if I tried! But I am doing a Canadian one, so that will have to suffice. Higgles.
2 people like this
@prasanna1990 (816)
• India
5 Feb 09
good posting my friend happy mylotting hope you complete more chalenges in ur life
3 people like this
@sparkofinsanity (20471)
• Regina, Saskatchewan
5 Feb 09
Well I certainly get enough of them here on the lot! LOL
2 people like this
@earthshine (21)
• United States
6 Feb 09
I have never been to Texas but from what i hear i would say you sound like a Texan. but you should still work on it a little.
3 people like this
@sparkofinsanity (20471)
• Regina, Saskatchewan
6 Feb 09
I think I'll stick to what I am.....Western Canadian! LOL
2 people like this
@moondancer (7431)
• United States
5 Feb 09
I love it sparks/ It is funny and it made me smile. Very Tex Sam. You did much better than I would have and I'm from the deep south, lol.
2 people like this
@moondancer (7431)
• United States
5 Feb 09
yes, I know your situation and that you are where you are and not dealing with or been in The states much less in the south or Texas...I think you did real good. That's why I told you that.
1 person likes this
@sparkofinsanity (20471)
• Regina, Saskatchewan
5 Feb 09
Not too shabby for a frozen Canadian then, who has NO accent at all eh? ROFL Thanks sweets. Truthfully, I'm not happy with this piece, but then I don't have a good ear for picking up accents, which are rather hard to covey in writing when you don't hear them in your head..........no matter how many voices are heard in that head! LOL
2 people like this
@checapricorn (16061)
• United States
5 Feb 09
wow sparks, A real talent for you there! Great composition!
I haVE NO idea about how they say things there but learnin from you now! LOL!
2 people like this
@sparkofinsanity (20471)
• Regina, Saskatchewan
5 Feb 09
Oh heck cappy, don't EVER learn anything from me! LOL My sparks of insanity just might cause your brain to explode! ROFL
2 people like this
@LouRhi (1502)
• Australia
5 Feb 09
Well not really knowing what would pass as a Texan or not I can't really answer. To my limited knowledge you would pass!
What I do know is that your brain sure is one of a kind and I love the way it ticks! Bring on the next challenge, it is one of my laughs of the day
2 people like this
@sparkofinsanity (20471)
• Regina, Saskatchewan
5 Feb 09
I've decided to leave my brain to science Lou! LOL That'll keep the scientists busy for years to come and change the course of genetic engineering don't you think? LOL
2 people like this
@AnnieOakley1 (5596)
• Canada
5 Feb 09
Very cute, sparks. I'm not that creative. You still amaze me.
Nope, I wunt take ya fer a Texan, but then what do I know, eh?
I'm Canadian, eh?
2 people like this
@sparkofinsanity (20471)
• Regina, Saskatchewan
6 Feb 09
I love Newfies! LOL
YOU should do a discussion in Newfie! What a hoot!
2 people like this
@sparkofinsanity (20471)
• Regina, Saskatchewan
5 Feb 09
Like, yeah, we Canadians don't have an accent do we, and we talk gooder than most folks too right, eh? LOL
3 people like this
@AnnieOakley1 (5596)
• Canada
6 Feb 09
Oh, but I love newfie accents. They put "H's", where they don't belong and take them out where they do. Hilarious! And they are so fun to be around. Party animals, really, but loads of fun for sure.
As you know, I grew up with them, so I kinda consider myself part newfie. If I start to hang around them enough, I speak their slang. I still kinda do a little bit.
And newfies really know how to tell the best newfie jokes. Now they are the KINGS of laughing at themselves and never taking offense to anything.
2 people like this
@thebeaddoodler (4262)
• Lubbock, Texas
5 Feb 09
Nope! All Texans know it's y'all, not ya'll LOL Nice try for a Canadian!
2 people like this
@sparkofinsanity (20471)
• Regina, Saskatchewan
5 Feb 09
LOL, I found that out AFTER I'd posted but couldn't go back and change it! Damn!
2 people like this
@sparkofinsanity (20471)
• Regina, Saskatchewan
9 Feb 09
Thank you, thank you. LOL Sometimes the responses are more fun than the discussion. Especially when they go off on a tangent of teasing each other. We have a LOT of fun and funny people here. Aren't you glad you're here too? LOL
1 person likes this