Having the housewife blues

I'm not a stay at home mom, but it does seem like my evenings consist of nothing but homework, cooking and dishes and my weekends consist of laundry, cleaning and grocery shopping. But at least I get out of the house on weekdays and enjoy some adult conversation. It's got to be isolating to be at home with a small child though. Are there any groups that you can get involved in with other parents of children the same age?

I know exactly how you feel... I am a staqy at home wife, I don't have kids yet, all I have is a yellw lab dog , oh yea and dish washer, sink are my buddies at home as well... If you have read some of my post before, I have talked about how lonely and boring at home during the day when my husband is at work. I always try to dog stuff to do, but I 'm sure you understand, doing laundry or prepare a meal won't take us 8 hours to get it done. I do feel blue somtimes, too much time to think, too much time to be alone. I'm not saying I'm glad to see there is somebody like me staying at home alone but I would like to share with you. :-)

Do you have a car? I found that I needed to get out sometimes and I would take the boys to the park and strike up conversations with other moms. We also joined a play group so they would have kids to play with and I'd have adults to talk to. Doing things like that once or twice a week kept me sane!

Hello Bama! I have the opposite problem - I was only able to stay home with my son for his first 6 weeks and then I had to go back to work. I think you're lucky that you get to stay home with your son every day. That's my wish and I'm working to make it happen - hopefully within a year. He does stay with my parents and I do get to spend my lunchtime with him but I still miss him dearly.

My goodness girl..what you doing with your time? Why should you feel alone when you have a husband and a child? Just because you are married and have a child doesn't mean you can't pursue a dream you have or hobby etc. I had 3 kids and I did alot of things, I never had a boring time. Think about things you can do with your son, my kids knew how to read, write and add even before going to kindergarten. I made friends with the neighbours, had them over, had garden parties for them & their kids, I worked from home until we broke up..I made money selling beauty products, home products, etc etc. I also took a sewing course, martial arts, etc. Come on girl..there is so much that you can do..

Do you enjoy a hobby? You need to find an adult outlet. For me it's the friends I have online, writing, some crafting, and reading. It's tough to be stuck but if you can find an outlet. We do volunteer work as a family. We clean up our neighborhood and things, work with the kids at the school at the corner. Find what works for you and your family. But find something.

i can understand your plight.i am a housewife with 2 kids.i give some time to myself for exercising.i usually do skipping ,a hundred times and i immediately feel better.and then once a month,i go to beauty parlours to pamper myself and once in a blue moon,i do go out for dinner with my hubby and kids.

hi bamakelly....i agree with you on that...but i did survive doing the chores at home with the help of course with my mom when she was younger then...i have 4 kids..but it was fun and at the same time stressful for us...but since i love them i really did not notice how time flies then....right now they are all grown up and help me in the house and everything..

I feel your pain lol. I'm a stay at home mom of 3 kids. My oldest started kindergarten this year. It gets very frustrating to always be cleaning. Especially when it is the same things every day. It gets to feel like a waste of time. So, sorry, I guess I don't have any good words of encouragement, I just wanted to let you know you weren't alone in what you are feeling. I try to get out of the house to do stuff and that tends to help. I'll go play bingo at the firehall with my friends on tuesday night or just go out and run some errands.

I know how you feel. I am a stay at home mom/housewife and sometimes I get stressed out to. I feel like there is always so much housework to do and just not enough hours in the day to get it all done. I have a 4 year old daughter and a 1 year old son. My son is in cloth diapers so thats even more work for me but its my choice. I always have at least 3 loads of laundry to do usually 5. Then there is mopping and vacuuming the floors. I love to vacuum but I hate mopping. My husband mopped for me the other day which was like a god send! I vacuum the floors downstairs everyday. I always have a load of laundry in the dish washer and usually a load to do by hand. House work is never ending and its exhausting. I wish I could afford to just pay someone to do all the work for me:)

I stayed home with my older kids until the youngest was in school all day, then I went back to work. so when we had our little surprise recently we didn't even think about it, we just decided I would stay home. Don't get me wrong, I love being home with the little guy and I know I don't want him in daycare, but after 10 years back in the work world I had forgotten how much of the work I do at home gets taken for granted. No one seems to notice the dishes and laundry getting done until you decide to go for a walk instead and you don't get them done! Your not alone bama.

I think a lot of the women with more than one use the older child as a babysitter. Sometimes far too much. Do you take him to the park? It's a way for you to get some alone time while he's playing with other kids. Or a day care, just for a couple hours. I sometimes did that. She needed to learn how to cope with other kids, and I needed some alone time. You're not being bad for needing that. He needs the time to socialize too. And you can't always play with him. He needs to learn how to play by himself, for his own creativity. Take a bit of time for yourself. You'll be happier, and so will your family in the long run.

I cant say that i know how you feel because i don't. I'm currently on maternity leave only for one more week and then i go back to work only to wish that my husband were the one with a job and i was the one that gets to stay home instead i'm the one brining home the bacon and he gets to kick it at home. Of course he doesn't do cleaning the only thing he does is makes messes when he cooks and then i clean everything and do laundry. Hmm doesn't seem fair in my eyes. I only wish that i could stay at home like you.

Hi, Sorry you have the blues. While I do not have kids I do know that you are not alone, there are many women that I know in the same place that you are. I suggest finding a play date for your little one so that you can have an adult conversation while he plays. If that is not possible then try to schedual a play date for yourself, perhaps meeting a friend at the park or something that you can also take your son to once a week. Good luck and have a great day!!

It's not hard to get the blues, what you need is some time out. Is that at all possible, can you take your child to a play date, or just to visit the neighbors? Can you do some crafts, that will help, your creative side is being neglected. See what is available to help you.

My youngest is 10 now, and I'm desperate to get back to work. I'm training at home but it's not the same as mixing with adults. I had 4 in total, and when my eldest was born (she's 20 now) I had to go back to work - I was torn between home and earning a living. I had twins when she was 4 and started a business to give me flexibility. Luckily my husband also worked from home, but it seemed to be all work and no play! I know it can be frustrating being at home with your child, but my advice is - don't worry that the house always has to be spotless. Your children are only young once and they grow up far too quickly - the baby doesn't mind if there's dust on the bookshelves! I managed to find local toddler groups and so on, where we took it in turns to do 'creche duty' so the other mums could go next door, get away from the kids and chat over a coffee. Perhaps there's something like that where you live?

Bama Kelly- I'm a stay at home mom currently, plus finishing my master thesis. I have a total of six children, but only 2 from my current marriage. (Though, at one time I did have the four oldest with me and was a single parent then). It can be difficult when you don't have an outlet such as a church/religious group, mommy's club, gym membership, or such that is just for you and your time. A friend of mine joined a gym recently that offers daycare included. This way she can interact with other women, the kids are cared for, and she gets much needed time. Not to mention the benefit of exercise. And a lot of gyms are now offering more then just treadmills, they offer a variety of classes. Some have even started offering Pole dancing classes, if your game. The winter time also seems to be traditionally the time that more people feel the winter blues, now actually called Seasonal Affective Disorder (which can be treated with medication). I'm not saying you have anything wrong with you, I do want to suggest that if it becomes serious such as depression that you may want to find a counselor. There isn't anything wrong with having to deal with depression. In terms of the just "I'm sick of being in the house with kids", I think that finding something to do outside of the house is extremely important. Have you ever thought of volunteering? Even hiring a sitter for a few hours each week so that you can go out to the spa and pamper yourself or get a massage can prove beneficial. If you can't do the sitter, then arrange with the hubby to take your child for a few hours each weekend (or his day off) and go and pamper yourself, do something for you. We have several junior colleges around this area that offer one time classes such as cooking or art classes. You might want to think about investing a bit in things like that to give you an outlet. And you may just discover a new hobby. The other thing to do is to get outside. In the winter I realize this is hard but our bodies need the sunlight. Sometimes just moving the furniture a bit so you can sit in front a large open window in the winter time helps. In the warmer months just going outside and sitting on a blanket and enjoying the warm sun can help rejuvinate. Many blessings-Anora

I'm feeling that exact way today! I have two kids, my son is a year and a half and my daughter is five so she goes to school. Two kids is such hard work as they fight all the time over toys. I take my son to toddler group some days just to get out of the house. Most of the day I'm cleaning the house and then by the end of the day its a mess again! I just wish I was rich so I could get a cleaner and then enjoy my time with my son. Your definitely not alone:)

hi, bamakelly like everyone else was saying there is more to bieng a house wife and homemaker. i always liked playing games with my son when he was younger and when he went for a nap is when i would have my time to clean and do what ever i wanted till he would awake and the back to involving him in what i was. at first you may not realize it but he will always remember the time well spent together frist memories start young maybe take pictures and show him it helps bring the memories to a understanding for him. when my husband arrived back home from work dinner was always done and then it would be off for some me time that way i didnt feel the only company i had ever was my son.

Hi lotter iam also a housewife and can understand ur feelings i have two kids and its really a tough job to be a homemaker.