Lets Gather And Rally Round And Show That MyLot is TRULY A Community
By pyewacket
@pyewacket (43903)
United States
May 29, 2009 3:40am CST
Many of us were shocked to learn about a beloved, very young member of MyLot who is no longer with us by the name of bellaofchaos. She had sought medical help and wasn't given it properly and was misdiagnosed. When her health condition became worse she was operated on but died during surgery. bella was only 30 years old and she leaves five children behind her. Another member here, the one who first informed the MyLot world of bella's passing also did a discussion to in effect raise money for the children left behind and unfortunately that discussion was deleted and unfortunately I can see why since a link was given, while NOT a referral link did go to a website to raise money for bella's children. So of course, partypooper mean-spirited shats deemed it necessary to report this...and heaven forbid THEY ever need financial help.
Anyway---I got a brainstorm..yes, it does happen from time to time. But I thought of a different way to get this poignant story noted.....the media...yes, the media.
Bellaofchaos was from Pittsburgh, Pa...so I'm thinking here, write letters to every major PA newspaper going no matter WHERE you're from...here is a general listing of PA newspapers
http://newslink.org/panews.html
(AND NO THIS IS NOT A REFERRAL LINK --but to a listing of PA newspapers)
Write a story/email from your heart and about the situation, and most important also include the link that sparks has to her site...PM her if she's on your list of friends or PM me...or if you have our private emails and we will give you the info...on the site sparks had set up--there is also a widget that one can copy and place on other sites or blogs
Now you might wonder--why write the media??--- Why? This is a major poignant, human interest story that especially during these hard economic times people will want to hear and would be willing to help out---heck you don't even have to be in the PA area of the US--write an email to YOUR newspaper wherever you are in the US---if a lot of papers are inundated with this story...SOMEONE is bound to pick it up. I plan to start tomorrow (or should I say later today...it's 4:36 a.m. as I write this)
Do you consider yourself a part of the MyLot community? Does it grieve you to hear a fellow MyLotter in pain, distress or their families...then do your part and get busy!! Show you really care!!
17 people like this
35 responses
@mentalward (14690)
• United States
29 May 09
I'll definitely be doing that today, pye! I was unable to respond to the other posts regarding this topic because I was so broken up by it. Yeah, me, speechless!
I did PM one of them to say how badly this had affected me but simply could not write in the posts. I even told my husband about it because it affected me so badly and I don't usually mention anything about what goes on here to him since he's never shown any interest.
She didn't live too far from me, since I'm in the northernmost part of Virginia and PA is maybe 30 miles from my house. I only wish I had known her better. However, I knew her well enough to be totally devastated by this!
Was this surgery in any way connected to her throat problem? Was the exact cause of her medical condition ever determined? I think it should be mentioned in case anyone else suffers similar symptoms. I think it's EXTREMELY important!
I'll be donating my earnings from myLot to that fund for her children. If I'm ever approved for disability, I'll be donating even more. I hurt so badly for her partner and her poor children. This was such a tremendous shock to me; it must be totally devastating for them!
Yes, I'll be doing this as soon as I get this posted. Thanks for the brainstorm!
@pyewacket (43903)
• United States
30 May 09
I just emailed you with a lot more info and thanks ever!!
1 person likes this
@tamarafireheart (15384)
•
29 May 09
Hi pye,
Yes I heard it early this morning and although I didn't know her, I know how all her friednds are feeling, what you sugessted is a brilliant idea and it will be know everywhere, maybe it will be world wide news, you never know.
Bright Blessings
Tamara
@pyewacket (43903)
• United States
30 May 09
I've already just now sent my letter to a number of PA papers--hope to hear from them soon and feedback from them
1 person likes this
@littleowl (7157)
•
31 May 09
Hi Pye I heard about this the other day, it is so upsetting and her children must be so devastated, poor things. I think it is a brilliant idea of what you have come up with and if in the UK there is somewhere to write then I will but wether it will have much impact I am not sure, though anything like this as you say should do especially the fact that Bella was misdiagnosed, the hospital or Drs should be sued. I do not know much about Bella as she wasnt on my friends list yet if you could pm or email me the details then I will be only too willing to write to the Papers...bb LoLo xxx
2 people like this
@sedel1027 (17846)
• Cupertino, California
29 May 09
Bella wasn't on my friends list, but I am willing to join up about this. What disease did she have?
3 people like this
@pyewacket (43903)
• United States
30 May 09
I sent you a PM with all the info sedel
1 person likes this
@ellie333 (21016)
•
29 May 09
Hi Pyewacket, I received an email notification this morning here in the UK and I was shocked and saddened by the news as someone so lively and so young with so much ahead of her to have been taken from her five young children at fiance in this tragic way. My thoughts and prayers go out to them. I haven't sparks email be think I have yours and would like to donate something although not from the US and didn't have Bella on my friends list. I agree we should all rally round at this very sad time to help where we can and also make the media aware. Will email shortly for details as not on Sparks list. Ellie xxx
@pyewacket (43903)
• United States
30 May 09
Got your email and sent detailed info to you just now
It is a shock though to hear about a fellow mylotter like this
2 people like this
@gemini_rose (16264)
•
29 May 09
I cannot believe I have just read this, I am totally shocked by this news. I am on facebook and funnily enough her name has popped up a few times as a suggested friend and I was going to add her as I have spoken to her a lot in the past on mylot and was also a huge fan of her stories. I am absolutely gobsmacked and just cannot believe that this has happened.
3 people like this
@pyewacket (43903)
• United States
31 May 09
I think it's a shock to a lot of us--and she was a friend of mine over at the "other" place--in face we only added each other as friends on May 10th!
1 person likes this
@katsmeow1213 (28716)
• United States
29 May 09
The name is not familiar, but it's still so sad! First thing I thought of was "Wow, sounds like me, same # of kids and only a year older!". That's so terrible what happened to her.
2 people like this
@TLChimes (4822)
• United States
29 May 09
*grumbles about reporters with no heart*
I have a plan... I'll let you know if something comes of it... My red wings are playing her Penguins for the Stanley cup. Maybe that can be useful.
Now about the community here.... I think there are several folks who get that we are a village of sorts and that means we should be able to count on each other... we should be able to get a smile from one another, a shoulder to lean on, or a helping hand from time to time.
You would think that it would be left unsaid that certain things be let go for the greater good...
@pyewacket (43903)
• United States
30 May 09
This really is a great "community"---when I was going through some hardships I had a few "angels of MyLot" help me----its just I thought most people wouldn't think about writing a letter/email to papers about this---only reason I did---I use to work on a local paper
1 person likes this
@polachicago (18716)
• United States
29 May 09
Pye, please email me with the story, I would like to help. I may need to know more details of the story. I am very sorry for Bella and her kids left behind.
I am going to stay in touch with you and take an action ASAP...
So sad that discussion was removed...
2 people like this
@polachicago (18716)
• United States
29 May 09
her profile shows that someone was login 2 hours ago....(family?)
2 people like this
@pyewacket (43903)
• United States
30 May 09
Yes I was puzzled about someone logging in and perhaps her fiancee--I just emailed you the whole story --and thanks ever
1 person likes this
@pyewacket (43903)
• United States
30 May 09
I just finished rattling off a LONG letter...I'm sending it first to another friend of mine to see what she thinks of it before I send it out everywhere
1 person likes this
@moondancer (7431)
• United States
29 May 09
This is a wonderful idea and I'm totally estatic about it. I will do this as I'm trying to do all I can. Thank you so much dear for the link and the idea!
2 people like this
@pyewacket (43903)
• United States
30 May 09
Thanks ever moondancer---I'm piecing all the info together to make a good letter to send to the papers
1 person likes this
@moondancer (7431)
• United States
30 May 09
Me too dear and I will PM you with some needed information.
2 people like this
@scarlet_woman (23463)
• United States
30 May 09
bella's gone?
oh that's really sad,i hadn't heard about that.
if there's a "chip in"link or something lemme know,and i'll post it on my sites.
2 people like this
@pyewacket (43903)
• United States
30 May 09
Already emailed you--yes unbelievable that she's gone
1 person likes this
@CatsandDogs (13963)
• United States
30 May 09
Hi Pye, I'm still in this numb stage and lost for words over this news. bellaofchaos was so kind and dear to me that I can not get the idea or thought in my head that she's gone. I also want to tell you too to make sure the word gets out there, does the father know he can get social security benefits for the children? If he doesn't will someone please let him know? The reason is because he'll never every cent he can get for babysitters and what not so he can continue to work to support them. RIP bella! We love you!! You'll never be forgotten!!
2 people like this
@someonesmom (5761)
• Canada
31 May 09
I am glad to hear that there's help available for Bella's kids, and (possibly) her partner, as they weren't married yet.
Here in Canada, surviving spouses, and their kids, both receive benefits. Initially, there's a lump sum payment, and then ongoing monthly support. I know about this firsthand, as I've been a recipient.
I hope that something like this can be worked out for Bella's family.
@pyewacket (43903)
• United States
30 May 09
I don't think the SS benefits would be much would they? Usually the surviving spouse gets about $250----don't know if the children would get anything
2 people like this
@CatsandDogs (13963)
• United States
30 May 09
Yes yes yes the children DO get something! When a parent passes away, the surviving children are entitled to survivors benefits. I'm not sure how it works but yes they are entitled to it.
1 person likes this
@pyewacket (43903)
• United States
30 May 09
I just PM you with all the info---I've been sending my letter to papers all night
1 person likes this
@PrarieStyle (2486)
• United States
30 May 09
I'm willing to write, I think it's a great idea. Please P.M. me the info.
I think we should all + her discussions and get her star rating up to a 10, too.
2 people like this
@pyewacket (43903)
• United States
30 May 09
Just realized your not on my friends list so requesting you as a friend so I can PM you
1 person likes this
@PrarieStyle (2486)
• United States
30 May 09
Wow that's weird. I thought we were friends.
2 people like this
@PeacefulWmn9 (10420)
• United States
30 May 09
This is so sad a story. I've not been here on mylot long and did not know bella, but as human beings, we are all brothers and sisters. The media in my area is usally great about getting word out when a family is in need, and the community answers in a large and helpful way.
Thank you for posting this information.
Karen
2 people like this
@pyewacket (43903)
• United States
30 May 09
I'm hoping bella's community will help out too--but thought if the story was made public on a wider scale would help more--been emailing papers all night
1 person likes this
@PeacefulWmn9 (10420)
• United States
30 May 09
You are right. The more widespread the knowledge, the better the chances of those five children receiving the help they need since their dear mothers passing.
Karen
2 people like this
@brendalee (6082)
• United States
29 May 09
Such a sad story. I am just learning about this. Gabs also has a discussion up about it. I hope many people do their part and help out. I would love it if you sent me a link to that site that sparks set up.
2 people like this
@pyewacket (43903)
• United States
30 May 09
I think I still have your private email....I'll send the info there
1 person likes this
@drumm1n (499)
• India
29 May 09
hey! i just gotta say this is really noble of you! I never seen her online or her discussions but i hope this helps her family out!You should try putting the link up for gathering money again.I wish i could help out but im not in the U.S hope this helps her family out.
2 people like this
@pyewacket (43903)
• United States
30 May 09
I wish I could post the link but it would be considered against the guidelines
1 person likes this
@hoghoney (3747)
• United States
29 May 09
Oh he!! NO are you saying that someone reported Sparks discussion about the fund set up...I was wondering why I could not find it...I would like to know who that was that reported it..anyhoo...I am in and will get busy on it this evening and ready to go in the morning....I cried all night over our Bella...things just wont be the same.
2 people like this
@pyewacket (43903)
• United States
31 May 09
Yes it is tragic--she and I often replied to each others discussions
1 person likes this
@cynicalandoutspoken (4725)
• United States
30 May 09
I know we just became "friends" but I am going to invoke my inner Bella and shake my finger at you in a disapproving manner.
Bella had a thing for research. So in her honor I'm going to help you out and correct your errors.
And I know it sucks that someone can't tell inflection in text but I am really smiling over here :) Thank you for giving me the ability to do something she so loved to do so much in responding to discussions.
1. Bella was from Johnstown PA and the local paper there is The Tribune Democrat. Here is a link to that paper. http://www.tribune-democrat.com/
Writing to a Pittsburgh Paper wouldn't get "local" recognition. Even though that is the closest big city to her they have more important things to cover like murders and rapes. The Tribune Democrat needs news so badly that they did a front page story on some kids Snow dragon melting. They also have a "Community Section" where they accept letters from "community" members.
Also if you got the local paper to pick up the story then you would get the local news station WJAC, http://www.wjactv.com/index.html then the bigger stations like the ones out of Pittsburgh may pick it up.
You have a wonderful idea but just needed some insight into how things work where Bella is from.
And...
2. Bella was 31. She just turned 31 in February. I only mention this because if someone is going to write the paper or contact the local news station they should have their facts straight.
There was another error in that I was the first to technically notify mylot of her passing but I wish that was something I never had to do so I will gladly let that one slide.
I will PM you with the rest of the information you will need to give to anyone else who wants to join in on the mission.
Thank you so much for your support in this. Bella and I only ever talked about a handful of mylotters in real life so it really warms my heart to see so many people from here joining together in this terrible time.
@Ravenladyj (22902)
• United States
1 Jun 09
I found her Obit. if ppl wanted to sign the guest book for the family...just PM me those that do and I'll share the link...
I just can't believe it still....
@pyewacket (43903)
• United States
30 May 09
Thanks so much for your support in this idea
1 person likes this