Spy Doll...
By twoey68
@twoey68 (13627)
United States
June 23, 2009 9:53am CST
I’ve recently heard of something and am wondering other ppl’s thoughts and such on it.
A friend of mine up North has three kids, the oldest being 3, and is 3 months pregnant with her fourth. She lives with her b/f and his parents. She collects foodstamps and medicaid on her, him and the kids. Recently when she went to her baby doctor they told her she had to participate in a special program for parents with 3 or more children. They said it was to help the kids get ready for a new sibling. They gave her a doll to take home. This doll is just like a real baby…it cries and you have to take care of it. You change it, burp it, feed it, rock it, cuddle it, everything you would do with a real baby. It also records…how long it takes you to respond to it when it cries, how much pressure you use when handling it, whether you do the right things to stop it from crying and how long it takes you to do whatever needs to be done for it. Then the results are given to DFS. By the way, you can’t shove it in the closet b/c it records that LOL
Now she doesn’t have a problem with it and says it doesn’t bother her to have to do it. It bothered the daylights out of me. I look at it as an invasion of privacy and DFS’s way of going on an abuse fishing trip without actually having to have a reason. Who’s to say this thing isn’t recording conversations, pics of ppl in the house or anything else. By the way, she got it last Friday, has to take it back on Tuesday, then back again on Thursday and finally again next Monday when they will keep it. I also wonder what’s stopping them from altering the recordings and then accusing her of child abuse or neglect of her own kids (I know ppl don’t think DFS workers would do that, but I’ve seen them swear under oath then lie through their teeth right to a judges face). I think they are simply looking for a reason to try to take her kids away from her. I’ve told her that I think she should talk to a lawyer and refuse to do it but she says she can’t b/c she’s afraid of making more trouble for herself.
Would you participate in this program? Do you think it’s right for them to even be able to do this? What would you do if you were told you had to participate or lose your benefits?
[b]**AT PEACE WITHIN**
~~STAND STRONG IN YOUR BELIEFS~~[/b]
13 people like this
49 responses
@slickcut (8141)
• United States
24 Jun 09
I would never take part in a program like that, it seems a little silly to me & also would feel it goes against my privatey...That does not seem a right thing to do, its like she is on trial or something..I am to busy to do anything like that, and i would end up forgetting about it..I can maybe understand a program like that "IF" she has been in trouble for failure to care for her child & they were mornintering her for some reason, but if thats not the case then it appears that would be against her rights....
@callarse1 (4783)
• United States
24 Jun 09
Forget? I thought the point of the program was to see how the children and how she can function with the new baby. "IF" she cannot handle three children then what will happen when the third child is born? 
1 person likes this
@Kashmeresmycat (6369)
• United States
23 Jun 09
OMG, that sounds horrible, completely horrible.
I can't even imagine that happening to someone and it does sound like they're trying to catch her doing something very wrong. Was she ever accused of child abuse or anything like that? And just because you are collecting some support for your family because you need some assistance doesn't mean you are a bad mother in the least.
This reminds me of the dolls that they give to teenagers in school for parenting classes so they understand how hard it is to take care of babies. This lady already has children, knows what it's all about, so what's the point? I don't like it and I think it's unfair she HAS to participate in order to receive benefits. That's disgusting to me.
2 people like this
@twoey68 (13627)
• United States
23 Jun 09
She moved to Michigan about 4 years ago and has never had any problems with DFS. She did have a child prior to moving up there and that child was adopted out by the state but that has nothing to do with up there and was several years ago.
I also think it's horrible that she's already caring for 3 kids, all 3 years old or younger, is pregnant with a fourth and is being made to care for a mechanical 5th...like she doesn't have enough to deal with already.
I really hope nothing bad happens b/c of it.
[b]**AT PEACE WITHIN**
~~STAND STRONG IN YOUR BELIEFS~~[/b]
2 people like this
@winterose (39887)
• Canada
24 Jun 09
I think you are absolutely right, although the doll is designed to be a information tool and then a teaching tool, there is all kinds of room for abuse. This is too much information if it does record, however if it only records how long the response takes to be answered or cuddled that alone is okay, the threat though is how far will these cadgets go, they are getting to evasive as it is.
What is the name of that doll or program I would like to do a research article on it.
1 person likes this
@GardenGerty (161080)
• United States
26 Jun 09
The ones they use in our highschools can be set to certain programs, like "colicky baby" and the data it records is not visual but only shows how long the "baby" was allowed to cry, etc. I think one of the names for this is a "Baby, Wait awhile."
1 person likes this
@drknlvly6781 (6246)
• United States
23 Jun 09
So it seems they've found another use for "Baby Think it Over". We had these dolls in high school. Its given to certain teens that teachers feel are at risk, for them to realize how much is involved in taking care of a baby. They say you have to change, feed, burp, rock, and cuddle the baby, but this is all symbolized by a key in the back of the doll. When the baby starts crying, you turn this key and hold it in that position for different lengths of time; these time periods are supposed to represent the different tasks of taking care of a baby.
I'm not sure what to make of your fears. I know here they wouldn't be likely to do that, because the system is taxed enough as it is, with foster children and those that need to be adopted. I don't think that Hamilton County JFS caseworkers would do such a thing. Heck, with all the downsizing they have been doing lately, I doubt if they would go as far as getting the dolls.
The only sure thing I can say about this is to keep a close eye on your friend and how she takes care of her kids. If you are right, you may need to go to court with her as a witness.
1 person likes this
@twoey68 (13627)
• United States
23 Jun 09
That is the doll I'm referring to but did not know the name of it. She did participate in that program in school as all the kids in that were in health class had to.
She's been living up there for about 4 years and has never had a problem with them but this just seems more like a fishing trip to try to find something wrong with her and how she cares for her kids.
[b]**AT PEACE WITHIN**
~~STAND STRONG IN YOUR BELIEFS~~[/b]
2 people like this
@drknlvly6781 (6246)
• United States
23 Jun 09
I have to admit it does seem a little fishy. You weren't worried about the first three kids and the way they were being treated, now you want to know on the fourth child how I treat a baby?
@jessi0887 (2788)
• United States
23 Jun 09
SOund like a bunch of bull. I would be suspicious too. I have never heard of this and it does seem like they are trying to find reasons why she is not a good mother. I would of said no from the start. If it was a program it would be an option. I would of just said no either way. Just sounds too fishy to me and I am like you what if its like a camera in the eye or something. NO Way!!!
2 people like this
@twoey68 (13627)
• United States
23 Jun 09
I sometimes feel like I'm over reacting to things but after being a foster parent for 2 years and seeing some of the crap they pull on ppl, I don't trust them at all. I've seen them bribe kids (mentally challenged kids mind you) with candy to get them to say their parents abused them, lie right a judges face, lie to kids about getting to go home or placements...they'll do anything to get what they want. There may be a few good ones but they are few and far between.
[b]**AT PEACE WITHIN**
~~STAND STRONG IN YOUR BELIEFS~~[/b]
2 people like this
@scififan43 (2434)
• United States
26 Jun 09
I do not think I would want something like that in my house either. It reminds me of the twilight zone episod about the talking doll. The DFC could be using that as an invesigation tool but who knows. Pheaps she should conset an attornney and get know about her legal right and have him or her look into this program.
@callarse1 (4783)
• United States
24 Jun 09
Sorry not sure what DFS stands for I guess it is the government agency you're talking about. I'm not sure if the doll records because I used a doll in "baby think it over" segment of our health class in school. It was pretty neat. It did pretty much what you described. Now as for it as a requirement: I would say it is a good thing. I don't think it's a spy baby (I'm not sure how they could get away with that without a warrant).
I want to preface the following with I do apologize if someone is offended. To me, if someone is making more children and needs to go on public assistance that seems to be bad management skills. For example, there are people who DON'T have babies because they know they cannot pay the bills. In my humble opinion (again please don't take it offensively) I believe people should support themselves and not have to rely on the government because their assistance isn't always a guarantee.
As for the lawyer idea--if she has enough money to hire legal representation, why is she even needing public assistance? Is she even disclosing her boyfriend's income and hers to the government? Many people don't & that deceptive to me.
Pablo
1 person likes this
@CraftyCorner (5600)
• United States
26 Jun 09
The agency may be concerned about the other children in the household mishandling the baby. They simply don't know the circumstances of your friend and the personalities of all the children under the roof. It may not be the parent about which they are concerned, that is a lot of young children and a fragile baby in a mix together.
*
@scarlet_woman (23463)
• United States
26 Jun 09
i'd go to my lawyer too if i was her.
things like that are too easy to doctor nowadays.
if you can't read it yourself to see what's on there and what isn't,how can that be fair?
that's as bad as the gas meters we have now (also up north)-they've gone digital so you can't see what you've actually used against what they say,so theoretically they can charge you whatever they want.
1 person likes this
@ANTIQUELADY (36440)
• United States
24 Jun 09
Maybe they think if they make her do that she will quit having children she can't afford & the taxpayers want have to pay her, him & all those kids.IF they are able to keep making babies they are able to get out & go to work & QUIT DRAWING ALL THE FREEBIES. I'M sorry if that offends u but people that do that offend me. I raised two sons by myself, worked like a dog & never got the first free thing. IF it takes a doll to get her to stop having kids so be it.
@celticeagle (168721)
• Boise, Idaho
24 Jun 09
She was really told she had to be a part of this program? I wonder if the doctor just said that because he knew she would feel intimidated by him and do it. It is an interesting idea and I wonder how it all comes out. Oh, I am sure DFS do alot of unethical things. Not all of them but some. She is really in a hard place.
1 person likes this
@TheCatLady (4691)
• Israel
26 Jun 09
I doubt it records conversations, but it records everything els. It is a fishing trip. Maybe they have a reason for doing to her.
1 person likes this
@Anora_Eldorath (6028)
• United States
24 Jun 09
Twoey-
I agree that it seems extreme. They aren't doing that with every other parent out there with more than three kids. It seems directed at those collecting benefits, and we all know full well it isn't just the poor people who abuse their children.
I think she should be contacting her congressmen, and even sending a letter up to the White House alerting them to this and expressing her concerns. Or, perhaps you could do that and explain she fears negative reprecussions if she were to send the letter. Best of luck.
Namaste-Anora
1 person likes this
@Polly1 (12645)
• United States
23 Jun 09
I understand your concerns when you put them the way you said. Personally I don't like to live in fear of what might happen. I think it is probably a good program and can be very helpful. My granddaughters and a nephew have all had those babies for a week. It was a school project, It also was a major grade for them in school. I do understand your concern with agencies like the welfare dept and children services. I know of instances where they tell bold face lies too. If this is a requirment then she has no choice, but to participate. I do know that these dolls are used alot and are not trying to set someone up for failure, they are a teaching doll.
1 person likes this
@Debs_place (10520)
• United States
24 Jun 09
That sounds wrong, it will come down to should she pay attention to her real kids or to her 'doll'. Good Lord she has 3, she doesn't need a practice one.
I think Dad needs to zip his pants and get an education and a job.
1 person likes this
@Barbietre (1438)
• United States
23 Jun 09
Well after 3 kids and now another on the way, something needs to be done. I do not think they have a recorder in it, my neice had one in high school. Maybe it is being used to give peope like herself a wake up call, some girls are thinking that having babies is fun. I had my tubes tied after 2, I knew it was not fun, but I was married and not on welfare. And maybe there are other reasons they are doing this that you are not aware if.Are her current children well cared for? With a child on the way why isn't she married? Does her boyfreind work? too many other questions here.
1 person likes this
@fwidman (11514)
• United States
23 Jun 09
It sounds rather unusual to me, I've never heard of such a thing. But, if it helps then I suppose it is a good thing. I'm sure that many people would ignore the doll or not take proper care of it and DFS workers need to find these people. It does not sound like your friend has any worries regarding the doll and taking care of it 
1 person likes this
@tamarafireheart (15384)
•
24 Jun 09
Hi twoey68,
I think its disgusting, what is the country coming too?, we don't have to do all that here and its degrading, she have already got children so why make her do all this? I don't unbderstand, if they stop her benefits, the children would suffer.
Tamara
1 person likes this
