Deadbeat Fathers
@princess07031980 (5412)
United States
August 7, 2009 10:58am CST
Who has raised a child (or maybe more than one) without the father figure for support? Did he ever send money? Was it your choice to raise the child alone, or would he just not own up to the responsibilty of his child(ren)?
I have a bay, nearly 2 years old, that has never seen his father. But I don't care. His father is useless, one who still lives at home with his mother and can't even take care of himself. He has no job, hasn't for years, and has chosen drugs, so as you can see, I am better off keeping my son away from him anyway.
It was a joint effort-I didn't want him around us, and he doesn't want anything to do with the baby anyway.
2 people like this
5 responses
@Christina504 (61)
• United States
7 Aug 09
I have a 10 year old son and he has never met his father once. His father has not ever sent any money to help take care of his son. He don't even live in the same state as us. His parents let my son come over when they are not busy. At least they have something to do with their grandson. If my sons dad were to show up out of the blue I would leave that up to my son if he wanted to see him or not. Any man with a d**k can make a baby but it takes a man to love it.
1 person likes this
@princess07031980 (5412)
• United States
7 Aug 09
Ain' that the truth? Well, since my son is so young, I would fight for his safety before I let his father ever come close to him. Lucky for me, his father was arrested about 4 months ago on battery charges to his current girlfriend (or maybe she is an ex, or something, I don't know.) I read about it in the county arrests. So I could definitely use that against him if he tried to pursue something with him-that his physical safety may be jeopardized. What's even more sad is we live in the same town-and our town in less than 1500 in citizen population.
@alharra (507)
• United States
7 Aug 09
My oldest is 13 now and hasn't seen her father in over 7 years and I have not received a dime from him in all that time. I don't even know where he is right now. My twins are 10 and their Dad split before they were 6 months old- no money from him either. I would love to get child support from the oldest's dad and I have a court order so at last count he owed me over $10,000- I plan on going to child support recovery in the next couple of weeks. As for the twins father- no plans on going after him for money. I don't need to worry about what he will do if he gets served with papers.
@princess07031980 (5412)
• United States
7 Aug 09
Isn't it terrible that a father (or in your case 2 fathers) are willing to walk out of their children's lives and not give a crap about them-or you and how hard it may be to raise them alone. You won't find to many mothers who are just willing to give up on their children. It happens, I know, but deadbeat fathers are much more common than deadbeat mothers. Must be nice to be able to continue your life just as it was and not have to take on responsibilty if you just don't want to, huh?
@princess07031980 (5412)
• United States
7 Aug 09
That is just another way for the responsibilty to be lifted off of them, and to try to make us look bad as the "acting" parent. Yes, it's never the fault of the parent who abandoned the children is it? You know, they left, because we were monsters and were about to attack them. Yeah right-they left because being a parent can't poosibly be any fun, and my God, there goes all of my money if I choose to stay and be active. I hate deadbeats!!
@rdadey (484)
• Canada
8 Aug 09
It seems for every good father there is a bad one. I feel sorry for mother's who have to raise a child alone because it can be very difficult. I feel sorry for children who have to grow up with no father or a one that is there one day and gone the next, over and over. I also feel sorry for the father's who do this to the mother's and the children, they have excluded two people from their lives that could give them true love.
I love my stepson and saw what his father was doing to hurt him. He came around once a blue moon when it was convenient for him. Once in a while he would give his son some cheap toy as if that made up for everything. After many discussions with my stepson I took his father to court and they granted me the right to legally adopt him, which I did.
Even then I still kept the door open but there was never anymore contact. His father only lived a couple miles away. When my son was 19 his father tried to contact him and has tried a couple more times. My son says he has only one father and that is me.
I feel so grateful for having my stepson. He has completed his education and has a really good paying job. Next year he plans on going to medical school. I feel sad for his deadbeat dad, he could have been me enjoying his son throughout his life.
I applaud all the single mother's who are strong. And it can be true also, that sometimes you are better off without that deadbeat father in your life. Stay strong.
@bluehibiscus (702)
• United States
7 Aug 09
That is so sad. It is awful when a father will not take responsibility for his child. My father was not great to us, he didn't leave but he didn't contribute anything either.
@princess07031980 (5412)
• United States
7 Aug 09
It is sad. In a lot of ways, it says that children are somewhat disposable. I guess in some deadbeat's eyes, why do they need to be responsible if the mother will handle all the problems and finances with raising a child? But in all reality, I would rather be broke all the time raising him than to have his father send me money but have to deal with his garbage. I don't think his father could handle him for a n hour, let alone actually be a good role model for him.
@ravirai8616561 (824)
• India
7 Aug 09
I don't feel like answering to this as it is a very sensitive issue.
@princess07031980 (5412)
• United States
7 Aug 09
Um...ok....then you shouldn't have said anything at all.
@princess07031980 (5412)
• United States
8 Aug 09
Well, it is responses like that that nobody really wants in their threads and besides, it's against the rules to answer like that anyway. (It's in the guidelines and rules.) LOL I was looking forward to my first response to being one I could genuinely respond to, and no....couldn't with this one!
