always the listener

I have the same problem. However , I realized that there are some people are bornt as listeners, and some are not. You should be proud of yourself that your bestfriend has trusted you to listen to her problems. Well, understanding is the main point here. My bestfriend always give me a call everytime she had problems with her husband, and it will take an hour to listen to her. However, everytime I feel like to share my problems with her, she doesn't seem pay attention to my words. In my understanding, she has had many problems, so I wouldn't bother her with mine...

I know exactually where you are going from. You see, I have this friend who has the same mentality as your friend does. I have learned not to be verbally involved with her, because she was not my real friend. I now turn to myself to disuse my issues as crazy as it sounds this helps me become more independent and more sophisicated.

I once had a friend who acted like that. At first, i disappointed and i tried not to care about him, but i can't do that however he was my best friend. What was i do then, remind him every time he look not hear or try to change the subject, such as "are you listening?" or " hey, i have a problem here". And it's work.

I have a friend like that, I dont think that she is uncaring as she hasnt always been that way, just that right now she has something going on, and thinking about it I have not had any problems in the past few years so I havent needed anyone there for me. Sometimes if you are having problems they can seem bigger than anyone elses, maybe this is just the way she is, maybe there is more to the problem than you know about. But has she ever been there for you, has she listened to you in the past? Or has she always been like this? If she has then maybe you need to find another friend who will be there for you, but keep her as a friend as she obviously means something to you as you call her your best friend.

in a bestfriend relationship we are expecting a give-and-take relationship. but then it is not always true in all relationship..in friendship if you choose a person as your bestfriend you will accept her for being who she is..and in that case that when you needed her and you feel that she is not attentive to your needs, so should tell her how you feel and that you need her attention even just for a while, just listening is already a big help to a friend who is down...but then you need to tell her because she might not aware of what she is doing and how you feel about it..

Friendship is all about give and take. Friends do this naturally. It's not normally something you think about. It just happens. At some times in life you may give more, at other times you may take more. The key point is that it's reciprocal. The problem starts when one person is constantly giving and the other one is taking. It doesn't have to be something physical. it can be something more abstract, like helping to solve problems. Have you tried talking to your friend about this? The next time you need to discuss something and your friend changes the subject, why not ask if they realise they have done this and explain how important it is to you that you continue with the discussion. If your friend constantly refuses to help you then maybe you should spend the time with other people/freinds in your life.