How Quick and Easy We forget
@hardworkinggurl (37063)
United States
May 16, 2011 4:44pm CST
I was thinking about this for a few days and it dawn(ed) 
on me that some people in life say they so care for you and poof all of sudden they up and leave with no traces behind.
How much do you really say you care about others and then make a quick decision and up and leave and never give the so called people you say you care about a second thought.
It actually did dawn on me where; even here by the way where many have shared so much personal information via PM, Email, IM's, and other networking site and say how much they truly care and appreciate us and poof one day you go looking and they gone with the wind.
While I understand that so any including me have lots going on off-line, how many of us actually care and or value their friends? 
Any networking methods you undertake to assure the people you care about are aware of your whereabouts? Or do you just not care?
on me that some people in life say they so care for you and poof all of sudden they up and leave with no traces behind.
How much do you really say you care about others and then make a quick decision and up and leave and never give the so called people you say you care about a second thought.
It actually did dawn on me where; even here by the way where many have shared so much personal information via PM, Email, IM's, and other networking site and say how much they truly care and appreciate us and poof one day you go looking and they gone with the wind.
While I understand that so any including me have lots going on off-line, how many of us actually care and or value their friends?
Any networking methods you undertake to assure the people you care about are aware of your whereabouts? Or do you just not care?18 people like this
55 responses
@mysdianait (66009)
• Italy
16 May 11
A 'dawn' would be an awakening? 
I care for many of my friends here on myLot and I know whee they are and why they are not posting, most of the time. There was one friend who was mia and it was beginning to get a worrying situation when, on Friday 13th, we were all reassured and she reappeared! 
I let everyone know when I will be absent or less present than usual and I know that those who missed my post would inform any others if anyone should enquire.
MyLot for me is a huge family and when there is an empty seat at the table Inotice it immediately and investigate. At the moment I have a search party out for my favourite referral who has disappeared... *sigh*
I care for many of my friends here on myLot and I know whee they are and why they are not posting, most of the time. There was one friend who was mia and it was beginning to get a worrying situation when, on Friday 13th, we were all reassured and she reappeared!
I let everyone know when I will be absent or less present than usual and I know that those who missed my post would inform any others if anyone should enquire.
MyLot for me is a huge family and when there is an empty seat at the table Inotice it immediately and investigate. At the moment I have a search party out for my favourite referral who has disappeared... *sigh*@hardworkinggurl (37063)
• United States
16 May 11
Hi mysd
Gosh yes do I know about people missing and having to search high and low. While I would never expect anyone to be like me in the searches I just wonder at times if people are this way off-line where they simply just do not look back.
Now you know I would search all of Italy for you right?
Gosh yes do I know about people missing and having to search high and low. While I would never expect anyone to be like me in the searches I just wonder at times if people are this way off-line where they simply just do not look back.
Now you know I would search all of Italy for you right? 7 people like this
@mysdianait (66009)
• Italy
16 May 11
If your search started at the top you would soon find me
I think that many here (and on other sites) have a different definition of the word 'friend'. To me it still holds the meaning that it had when I was at school
I think that many here (and on other sites) have a different definition of the word 'friend'. To me it still holds the meaning that it had when I was at school 7 people like this
@hardworkinggurl (37063)
• United States
16 May 11
Yeah we think alike because I have learned not to throw it around lightly and when I do use it I truly mean it. Yes I would move heaven and earth to find you.
7 people like this
@ajk111 (2495)
•
17 May 11
maybe i am being neive (sp?) but i find the online community more friendly then the ones i deal with on a day to day basis. Sure, that is based on some hard knocks over the years but i do feel certain people are more sincere online and if i am being taken for a ride, so be it, it is a scenic ride and i am enjoying it without feeling foolish.
my fault is i am a ying & yang type of guy, no inbetween. so i give 100% loyalty and if i get scarred once it's goodbye vienna!
that probably accounts for why offline i have many friends but none i would call close.
my fault is i am a ying & yang type of guy, no inbetween. so i give 100% loyalty and if i get scarred once it's goodbye vienna!
that probably accounts for why offline i have many friends but none i would call close.6 people like this
@hardworkinggurl (37063)
• United States
17 May 11
Hi ajk
Is it not amazing that it takes for us to get older to develop so much wisdom. Sadly I do know what it is like with offline friends and the fact that I can't also count them as close either. Leaves me to wonder at times why? because I am no different offline as I am online. Caring, sincere and very giving but unfortunately so many today are so busy and not taking a second to recall that life is too short.
I especially understand the "it's goodbye Vienna!" too lol
Is it not amazing that it takes for us to get older to develop so much wisdom. Sadly I do know what it is like with offline friends and the fact that I can't also count them as close either. Leaves me to wonder at times why? because I am no different offline as I am online. Caring, sincere and very giving but unfortunately so many today are so busy and not taking a second to recall that life is too short.
I especially understand the "it's goodbye Vienna!" too lol4 people like this
@ajk111 (2495)
•
17 May 11
i find this true also that i am no different offline. i hazard a guess that a lot of people are clouded by first appearences. judging a book by it's cover. i certainly have seen this in my working life and suspect it is responsible for many a wrong promotion.
i wonder how many of us, if we met up, would say to ourselves, "now i did not expect them to look like that!"
5 people like this
@hardworkinggurl (37063)
• United States
17 May 11
Well I know you do not look like that fierce tiger in your avatar
I kind of imagine you as a warm, cuddly, and friendly teddy bear.
I kind of imagine you as a warm, cuddly, and friendly teddy bear. 3 people like this
@Hatley (163776)
• Garden Grove, California
16 May 11
hi hardworkinggurl I try to keep in touch with asm any of my mylot fruebds as I can each day. ever since I had to leave my room as mytroomie was contagius, I have got so far behind. I had probably 700 notiifcations and what makes it even worse is that there is some glitch where when I tad to finally delete the oldest ones as my email box was overflowing, my delete button turn to undelete. lol My son worked on my computer for hours trying to unglitch that and its still doing it.Iknow some people here probably think I have forgotten them. perhaps my going to my own discussions and getting updated on them will help my friends to know I have not forgotten them.I feel so bad about my cousin whom I found a year ago and kept up an almost daily email correspondence has not contacted me in months. I know I have
been lax on my part but she had not written me even two words either. Also I have made a few phone calls to the people with whom I worked for 23 years. they all swore they would be in touch with me. uh huh oh yeah,. no phone calls no emails, those who said oh we are going to mniss you so much,Some missing. most of them are married with families but still it only takes a few moments to call me on the phone. they had my number. we all had each others numbers in fact. our new assistant had done that , then she got moved up to a job at headquarters.
6 people like this
@purplealabaster (22091)
• United States
17 May 11
Speaking of old friends from work, there are still a couple that I talk with every now and then. We do not talk on a regular basis, but out of the blue ... for no particular reason except that we were thinking of each other and missed each other ... one of us will call. It could be in a month or not for a couple of months, but we never do lose touch.
Unfortunately, there is another friend that I was really close with that I probably will never hear from again. After he left the place where we both were employed, we would get together at lunch on a regular basis and take a walk or eat lunch together and catch up. We even sent e-mails regularly. Then one day I called and found out that he had retired. Now, admittedly I was not there (at work) either as I had just had my baby, but he did have my home number, which is where I usually called him from. When I tried sending him an e-mail, I found that the account was closed as well. I have always wondered whether something bad happened to him or whether he just took off after retiring never to be heard from again.
I have always wondered whether something bad happened to him or whether he just took off after retiring never to be heard from again.1 person likes this
@hardworkinggurl (37063)
• United States
17 May 11
I do have a few that up and left out of my life like the wind. I do think of them often and though it saddens me not know if they are okay, I always wish them well holding on the hope that they are okay, this way I continue to relish the fond memories.
4 people like this
@hardworkinggurl (37063)
• United States
16 May 11
Hi Mrs. Hatley
Don't I know this feeling as I too went through this after being unemployed, where so many forgot, I think my name as it was not longer covered in high dollar amounts.
Having this now been my 12 month here 
I am sensing there are a lot more who actually do care and so look our for one another. If Mrs. Hatley's cool avatar's are not seen for a couple days, you betcha a whole lot of us are networking to make sure she is doing fine.
Don't I know this feeling as I too went through this after being unemployed, where so many forgot, I think my name as it was not longer covered in high dollar amounts.
Having this now been my 12 month here I am sensing there are a lot more who actually do care and so look our for one another. If Mrs. Hatley's cool avatar's are not seen for a couple days, you betcha a whole lot of us are networking to make sure she is doing fine. 7 people like this
@debrakcarey (19887)
• United States
19 May 11
I left for awhile but it was not my choice. I was unemployed and the internet provider disconnected me. It took a full year to get where I could afford to get back online after I got another job.
Perhaps that is what happens sometimes, unexpected trouble or problems can sneak up on people and cause them to not be here or on their social sites.
I get attached to my online friends, but it is not easy to keep up with all of them.
6 people like this
@debrakcarey (19887)
• United States
20 May 11
When I returned to being online I found many messages on other sites wondering where I was. A few, very few have my personal info and we did keep in touch.
I understand about expectations that don't materialize. We often think someone cares when in reality they only are being polite. That is hard to take.
6 people like this
@hardworkinggurl (37063)
• United States
20 May 11
Nice that some sent messages and do hope that since your return you have actually found some really great online friends. See with me when I call someone a friend and not just listed as one, but when I call someone a friend, I truly mean it. I look forward to interacting with you more often and surely, you will find sincerity with me.
4 people like this
@hardworkinggurl (37063)
• United States
19 May 11
Hi debrakcarey
So true so many come and go and sometimes we have no clue as to what is going on with them. Life definitely happens and sometimes not much we can do to pre-inform at times. But then a year later here you are, back and made your presence known and those true friends hopefully were around upon your return. I often wonder though about offline friends because some come and go just as easy as online friends at times.
I completely understand your situation gone for a year and do hope that during that time a friend or two actually phoned and or went out of their way a bit to see how is debra doing today. Those tiny words I am sure would have made you smile on one of your so gloomy days. I am sort of living this situation and it is an awful feeling to recall those who said I was a good friend.
So true so many come and go and sometimes we have no clue as to what is going on with them. Life definitely happens and sometimes not much we can do to pre-inform at times. But then a year later here you are, back and made your presence known and those true friends hopefully were around upon your return. I often wonder though about offline friends because some come and go just as easy as online friends at times.
I completely understand your situation gone for a year and do hope that during that time a friend or two actually phoned and or went out of their way a bit to see how is debra doing today. Those tiny words I am sure would have made you smile on one of your so gloomy days. I am sort of living this situation and it is an awful feeling to recall those who said I was a good friend. 4 people like this
@tiffnkeat (1673)
• Singapore
17 May 11
I care...HWG, maybe late in responding, but no less I care. Been busy lately, but never too far from the lotters. Just shifting around to look for interesting bits to respond to.
hehe..smile!
6 people like this
@hardworkinggurl (37063)
• United States
17 May 11
Hi tiffnkeat
Oh gosh how I know you do care dear friend. I can see it from your typing here and there. See that was always my goal here on myLot is to have all know me not for what I look like, my likes and dislikes but for what and how people read me when I typed into responses. To give people a sense of what type of real and sincere person I am.
The discussion sort of stems on the fact that some convey they are friends and yet they pick up and leave, while some come back in hiding and never once look back and try to fool many into believing they are someone else. While I respect their privacy, I could not help but wonder if off-line they did the same thing.
Recently a friend off line has gone missing and no family and or friend knows the where abouts. The member removed everyone from FB and no one knows where the friend is at. So got me wondering how much do we actually value some friends and or family when we do not take a moment to say Hi or how are you?
Carry on friend I know you are here and know you find me from time to time and always stop in to say hello.
Oh gosh how I know you do care dear friend. I can see it from your typing here and there. See that was always my goal here on myLot is to have all know me not for what I look like, my likes and dislikes but for what and how people read me when I typed into responses. To give people a sense of what type of real and sincere person I am.
The discussion sort of stems on the fact that some convey they are friends and yet they pick up and leave, while some come back in hiding and never once look back and try to fool many into believing they are someone else. While I respect their privacy, I could not help but wonder if off-line they did the same thing.
Recently a friend off line has gone missing and no family and or friend knows the where abouts. The member removed everyone from FB and no one knows where the friend is at. So got me wondering how much do we actually value some friends and or family when we do not take a moment to say Hi or how are you?
Carry on friend I know you are here and know you find me from time to time and always stop in to say hello. 3 people like this
@ravisivan (14079)
• India
16 May 11
Madam: People leave forums temporarily for valid reasons -- some go on tours where they do not have access. After a few days you feel it is worth taking rest for a day or two. People who are on different forums -- you cannot announce above leaving and coming. Is it not palatable to say so.
Forums, institutions, countries -- they all have one thing common. People come in and go out. like travel in flights or trains. We do care. I know you have raised this discussion after a discussion similar to this from d-- I answered that discussion just now and I remember.
You are all one of the very active players in this forum. Keep running/walking.
6 people like this
@hardworkinggurl (37063)
• United States
16 May 11
Hi ravisivan,
I don't think you understood 
I am not speaking of those that take a break, or decide to leave the forums.
I am more saying the ones that actually share more with one another then just the forum. After being here a while you tend to develop some bonding with some members where we actually communicate via telephone and or emails and share a lot of personal information where we no longer feel we are myLot members but friends.
So I compare that to friends off line also, wondering if some felt that while friending someone and sharing so much you just up and leave and never look back.
I am not speaking of those that take a break, or decide to leave the forums.
I am more saying the ones that actually share more with one another then just the forum. After being here a while you tend to develop some bonding with some members where we actually communicate via telephone and or emails and share a lot of personal information where we no longer feel we are myLot members but friends.
So I compare that to friends off line also, wondering if some felt that while friending someone and sharing so much you just up and leave and never look back.7 people like this
@hardworkinggurl (37063)
• United States
16 May 11
ravisivan the longer you are here on this wonderful site the more you will be able to differentiate the difference from a lot of other sites. This is like one big happy family here.
5 people like this
@ravisivan (14079)
• India
16 May 11
nice way of explaining and clarifying the doubt I had.
7 people like this
@MsTickle (25180)
• Australia
26 May 11
I would like to say I don't care but that would not be true. I'm sick of so called friends who promise friendship forever then poof! they are gone. I miss people when they are no longer around.
When this site was still young, there were some hassles with a group calling themselves the MLPD. They were self nominated police who made problems for lots of members. They caused lots of members to leave here. Meanwhile, others left and went to Yuwie. Some members stayed but did not come to this site like before but they joined sites like Gather. I was invited to join too but I was not having any problems here. It was really difficult but eventually new friends were made but I still found they were not true friends. There are not too many of us left from the beginning and I have only a small number of friends but no-one I'm really close to and in constant contact with.
@cream97 (29087)
• United States
17 May 11
Hi. hardworkinggurl. This is the honest truth! I am on myLot as much as I can. No one knows my schedule but me. I have at least nine hours to post here at myLot. After that I have to go back to my personal life. I value many friendships on myLot and I never take any for granted either. When I am away from myLot for many reasons, I always miss everyone here. I enjoy being here. MyLot is like another part of my life that I express daily. I enjoy writing, it makes me happy and relieved. I may not be able to talk to everyone on here, but I post as much to let others know that I do care. I don't have any members phone numbers. I may have an email address though. I am planning on starting another account with Facebook so that I can invite many myLot members. I hope that you will be one of my friends as I set up my new account. When I come back to myLot after being away from this site, I always am happy! It feels good to be able to meet back up with my dear friends here again.
When I come back to myLot after being away from this site, I always am happy! It feels good to be able to meet back up with my dear friends here again.3 people like this
@hardworkinggurl (37063)
• United States
17 May 11
Hi cream
Oh gosh cream I can see how sincere you truly are with all your writing here on myLot. I can see how sincere you are even with all the new members upon you entering their discussions.
I also have a secondary FB account as well and would also like to be included in yours. I do know how excited you are after being away and know that we too always feel very happy to see you back as well.
I would miss you dearly if I did not see you around for a while because you bring a lot of smiles to the Lot!
Oh gosh cream I can see how sincere you truly are with all your writing here on myLot. I can see how sincere you are even with all the new members upon you entering their discussions.
I also have a secondary FB account as well and would also like to be included in yours. I do know how excited you are after being away and know that we too always feel very happy to see you back as well.
I would miss you dearly if I did not see you around for a while because you bring a lot of smiles to the Lot! 4 people like this
@hardworkinggurl (37063)
• United States
5 Sep 11
Cream is a very long time member here and does well when she is here. She does share a lot with us and also helps us too with our sharings as well. I have not seen cream in a while and hope all is well for her these days.
I am sure the kids are going back to school soon so maybe a bit busy with them. We miss you cream and know that we will be here upon your return.
3 people like this
@hardworkinggurl (37063)
• United States
30 Sep 11
Cream has since returned once again and I was very happy to see her. She is a very long time member and is very loyal to myLot.
3 people like this
@yoyo1198 (3641)
• United States
16 May 11
Apparently, you've had someone up and disappear on you? That's sad. I think that if I were to just not be around it will be because I've kicked the bucket and my family won't know all of my online contacts. I've not left any instructions for them as to what to do if that were to occur. Maybe I should?
I have a few friends that I've talked with via phone as well as online. Not talked to them lately but I still see them around. I deactivated my FB account but they were still there when I did that. Also send messages back and forth in the Pogo mail.
So, yes, I do care. But I've obviously been careless about what's to be done should the worst happen to me. XOXOXOX
3 people like this
@purplealabaster (22091)
• United States
17 May 11
I think that many of us do not have a plan in place for what to do if something should suddenly happen to us ... I know that I don't. I think that perhaps many of us feel that preparing for something unexpected and bad to happen to us is slightly morbid. That is not to say that being prepared is not a good thing, because it generally is good to be prepared for just about anything. I just don't think that many of us like to think about that sort of thing, especially if we are young and in good health.
@hardworkinggurl (37063)
• United States
16 May 11
I think it is because we figure we know exactly where to find them right away and do not give it a second thought, which reminds me that at times off-line I too have done the same where I have taken for granted I could find such and such and then poof they are long gone.
Several have lately have left; some on their own and some not so
6 people like this
@hardworkinggurl (37063)
• United States
17 May 11
so right PA it is the farthest from my mind, a member told me that she has a list of all her close near and dear online friends on a list and has informed her children exactly where to find that list in the event she was to die. I concentrated on the word "die" and it shocked me but then I remembered so true, see we do not plan but perhaps we do need to consider it.
6 people like this
@shattered (1728)
• Philippines
17 May 11
People may leave for so many different reasons. Especially online. maybe they forgot their passwords, no internet access or have given up on certain site.
It's hard when people leave, but you get used to it. One way or another.
As for me, I'm just around the corner 
As always on and off my lot. Been using the search bar more than the actual site lately because of work load.
As for me, I'm just around the corner As always on and off my lot. Been using the search bar more than the actual site lately because of work load.5 people like this
@shattered (1728)
• Philippines
17 May 11
Maybe you should. You always make interesting threads, makes my mind work and take some time to respond
And I'll respond to them when I have time like these 15 minutes
And I'll respond to them when I have time like these 15 minutes 5 people like this
@hardworkinggurl (37063)
• United States
17 May 11
shattered
Glad to see you around. I know how busy you must be, just make sure especially offline you say hello to those who care for you because life is so short, that sometimes we forget and loose track of time and life passes by.
I am so use to you popping, in from time to time, hey maybe I should start more discussions to get you out of that corner form time to time. hehe
Glad to hear the search bar is working for you, 
Glad to see you around. I know how busy you must be, just make sure especially offline you say hello to those who care for you because life is so short, that sometimes we forget and loose track of time and life passes by.
I am so use to you popping, in from time to time, hey maybe I should start more discussions to get you out of that corner form time to time. hehe
Glad to hear the search bar is working for you, 5 people like this
@hardworkinggurl (37063)
• United States
17 May 11
I love that I can count on you. Be well my friend and I will surely check on you from time to time.
4 people like this
@topffer (42156)
• France
16 May 11
I am guilty to not notice immediately when they are missing, but I don't forget my myLot's friends easily and I try to have some news from them. I have the emails of some close friends, but sometimes an accident can happen : I realized when I found a burglar in my house, that I should have lost not only my data but all my passwords with my computers, including my emails passwords
. My close friends online are like my friends in real life, and I am worried when a friend vanished, not only from myLot, but also from the internet without a word. I know that you are one of those who take care of your friends. The value of online friendship is sadly not the same for anybody...
. My close friends online are like my friends in real life, and I am worried when a friend vanished, not only from myLot, but also from the internet without a word. I know that you are one of those who take care of your friends. The value of online friendship is sadly not the same for anybody...
3 people like this
@hardworkinggurl (37063)
• United States
16 May 11
So true topffer that I often wonder if the same is handled off-line. I think the world is just getting so busy that many are taking the "friendships" for granted. Sometimes we do not do it, intentional as life does hold us back.
But I am like mysd says above very old school and do value friendships.
6 people like this
@purplealabaster (22091)
• United States
17 May 11
"I like to criticize youngsters, like all old people" I guess that is my challenge to keep you young, Top, so that you have the energy and mobility to be able to criticize us youngsters ... it is just not the same if you are doing it while holding on to your walker, you know!
2 people like this
@mysdianait (66009)
• Italy
16 May 11
I have still not understood why phones are no longer used to talk with 
6 people like this
@hardworkinggurl (37063)
• United States
16 May 11
Because they help us put things like HWG
4 people like this
@mythociate (21435)
• Oklahoma City, Oklahoma
20 May 11
If anyone cared so much about my whereabouts, my whereabouts would be about where they are.
But no, no one really cares; as long as I'm not 'in danger,' I'm too dangerous to be near.
I do my best, but I can only be one place at a time. My work might be thinly sprayed all over the Internet, but I can't always react!
I do my best, but I can only be one place at a time. My work might be thinly sprayed all over the Internet, but I can't always react!5 people like this
@hardworkinggurl (37063)
• United States
21 May 11
Hi there,
Awh sorry to hear that you feel that many do not care. I do know what this is like because see my name is no longer attached to the 6 1/2 figure annual salary anymore so somehow I am not unlabeled, is my assumption.
Maybe it is time we made new friends and or just allow new friends to develop?
Awh sorry to hear that you feel that many do not care. I do know what this is like because see my name is no longer attached to the 6 1/2 figure annual salary anymore so somehow I am not unlabeled, is my assumption.
Maybe it is time we made new friends and or just allow new friends to develop?5 people like this
@hardworkinggurl (37063)
• United States
22 May 11
I understand and regardless of how they and or any of my past friends where abouts I think of them all often. So to a sense though they do not want to be bothered with I respect their privacy.
4 people like this
@mythociate (21435)
• Oklahoma City, Oklahoma
21 May 11
Well, sorta. Maybe we need to refocus on our purpose/career. If we need to change careers because our friends need us to do something different, that's fine; but I remember Jesus Christ saying something-like 'I do nothing but what I see the Father do before me.'
(Maybe He meant 'I do nothing but what I see tradition calls for me to do'--as in "do as your father & mother do before you"--but I hope not; divorce 1) is--I understand--something painful, and 2) requires one to get married first, requiring me to get thru hoops only a strong woman can toss me thru 
)
I know Jesus said, "Seek ye first The Kingdom of God, and all these things will be added unto you." Among 'these things' is the support of friends, which comes about when what you're doing is supporting them.
Anyway, when you get busy enough making sure all your friends have you then you'll be distracted from 'worrying about whether you have any friends'; and that way ANY friend is a good friend!
)
I know Jesus said, "Seek ye first The Kingdom of God, and all these things will be added unto you." Among 'these things' is the support of friends, which comes about when what you're doing is supporting them.
Anyway, when you get busy enough making sure all your friends have you then you'll be distracted from 'worrying about whether you have any friends'; and that way ANY friend is a good friend!5 people like this
@Orson_Kart (6546)
• United Kingdom
17 May 11
I just got as far as "How Quick and Easy We forget" and guess what........
I forgot! haha
I did once know a Trace and admittedly left her behind (with good reason!)
What was the question? :P
3 people like this
@hardworkinggurl (37063)
• United States
18 May 11
Hi Orson_Kart
None really it was an excuse to get you to come over to my topic.
Hope you have been well and that the ole naughty cold you had a few weeks back has finally shaken away. The topic really stems from several members have involuntarily been made to leave, while several others for which many of us interact not only here but on the phone, email and or text and poof some of them up and disappeared on their own with no word back, so just curious if we did the same to offline people as well.
I also had an offline friend recently who did just that, disappeared, remove everyone from FB yet we can see the interaction with others and not word so just wondered if many did the same offline and if they even cared for friends, because hence the word friend. I am very old school and a list to me is nothing but a true friend means the world to me.
None really it was an excuse to get you to come over to my topic.
Hope you have been well and that the ole naughty cold you had a few weeks back has finally shaken away. The topic really stems from several members have involuntarily been made to leave, while several others for which many of us interact not only here but on the phone, email and or text and poof some of them up and disappeared on their own with no word back, so just curious if we did the same to offline people as well.
I also had an offline friend recently who did just that, disappeared, remove everyone from FB yet we can see the interaction with others and not word so just wondered if many did the same offline and if they even cared for friends, because hence the word friend. I am very old school and a list to me is nothing but a true friend means the world to me. 3 people like this
@hardworkinggurl (37063)
• United States
1 Jun 11
lol you sure know how to make laugh and smile, I will give you that. lol
3 people like this
@Orson_Kart (6546)
• United Kingdom
18 May 11
"None really it was an excuse to get you to come over to my topic"
Well it worked! :)
I am as well as can be expected, but I don't want to dwell on my own misery. How is yours? I mean......"How are you?" of course.
Nothing wrong with old school, I am one myself...just can't remember exactly which school it was. :P
5 people like this
@kris182_2000 (5444)
• Canada
16 May 11
Few of my online friends are real life friends.
The people I know online are simply networking contacts or buddies for online games, and that's really as far as relationships go for me in the online world.
I don't always notice when people disappear, but have noticed it on Facebook when people from my list disappear. Today I noticed one, it was easy as it was someone from one of the games I use, and was ahead of me in rankings. They no longer use Facebook by the looks of it.
I've never given email addresses out, I've never really trusted anyone online with all the scams that are around.
2 people like this
@kris182_2000 (5444)
• Canada
16 May 11
There are several groups out there that keep users safe, if you want to be friends there, let me know and I can send you the information.
The number of scams on there is insane, and there are tons of warnings about them.
2 people like this
@purplealabaster (22091)
• United States
17 May 11
Alright, I have been here for a couple of hours now and have only made it just past the first page of this discussion, so I guess that I had better respond here now or forever hold my peace ... or something like that.
There are not a lot of people that I am really close to, and lately I have found myself more withdrawn than ever before. I do try to keep in touch with friends both on-line and off-line, but sometimes it is difficult, especially when they are busy and our schedules do not match. On the other hand, I have friends that I have had since I was a child, and although we might not talk every day or even every month, we always know that we will be friends and reach out to each other at some point no matter what. I think that is what a real friend is ... someone that you know will be there no matter what (and who you will be there for no matter what), even if you have not spoken in a while. Don't misunderstand me, I do try to keep in touch with my friends, but we know that we have busy lives and not keeping in touch on a regular basis is not an indication that we do not care.
There are not a lot of people that I am really close to, and lately I have found myself more withdrawn than ever before. I do try to keep in touch with friends both on-line and off-line, but sometimes it is difficult, especially when they are busy and our schedules do not match. On the other hand, I have friends that I have had since I was a child, and although we might not talk every day or even every month, we always know that we will be friends and reach out to each other at some point no matter what. I think that is what a real friend is ... someone that you know will be there no matter what (and who you will be there for no matter what), even if you have not spoken in a while. Don't misunderstand me, I do try to keep in touch with my friends, but we know that we have busy lives and not keeping in touch on a regular basis is not an indication that we do not care.2 people like this
@zed_k4 (17589)
• Singapore
18 May 11
Agrees with Purple ...
Maybe MSN between friends can be a good thing to improve on those communication loop-holes. If myLot has a bulletin board like a short BRB in 2 weeks or something it will be awesome. Right now , we have to make do with discussions and notices on profile pages , if any.
In real life situation , I agree too. It doesn't have to be constant contact and meet for the relationship to stabilize. Be it in friends or other examples. Absence makes the heart grow fonder ...
2 people like this
@hardworkinggurl (37063)
• United States
18 May 11
Until the day their is a communication feature here we all have to drum up some really great discussions to continue to draw us back in and out of the boxes.
5 people like this
@hardworkinggurl (37063)
• United States
17 May 11
Hi Purple
I believe a lot of us have situations as you mentioned, where although we have distance we can still hold love and endearment in our hearts, yet still remember them and when life draws back together we can certainly pick up where we left off.
There are some who at times do take some friends for granted always feeling that I will call/communicate with them later and later turns into a year or more.
I noticed a lot of that not just here but offline too, and could not help but wonder how some simply completely fade and although no one has done anything to them for some reason one cannot help but wonder if they did something to them because calls/emails and or any form of communication goes completely to zero.
While I certainly understand that lots can happen to many offline and life somehow just does not permit to get back. Just wondered how much actually remembered the "good" friends and or if we simply forget them in total.
Surely I do know who values and doesn't, sometimes I just get puzzled by some people's actions.
I believe a lot of us have situations as you mentioned, where although we have distance we can still hold love and endearment in our hearts, yet still remember them and when life draws back together we can certainly pick up where we left off.
There are some who at times do take some friends for granted always feeling that I will call/communicate with them later and later turns into a year or more.
I noticed a lot of that not just here but offline too, and could not help but wonder how some simply completely fade and although no one has done anything to them for some reason one cannot help but wonder if they did something to them because calls/emails and or any form of communication goes completely to zero.
While I certainly understand that lots can happen to many offline and life somehow just does not permit to get back. Just wondered how much actually remembered the "good" friends and or if we simply forget them in total.
Surely I do know who values and doesn't, sometimes I just get puzzled by some people's actions. 6 people like this
@bounce58 (17387)
• Canada
17 May 11
In my past, I have been guilty of just quitting on a friend, who I may have even used. Although it was a lifetime ago, I've always been guilty about that.
So now, I always try to make sure that I go above and beyond what friendships call for. To my offline friends at least.
It is a bit difficult, but I also try to do the same with my online friends. But I know, I fail miserably
@purplealabaster (22091)
• United States
17 May 11
I wonder whether or not we have all been guilty of this from time to time. I do not think that I have ever used any of my friends, but I do feel that I was not as good of a friend at times as the other person deserved. I really have a lot of regrets about one friendship in particular - she was my best friend, but I fear that I was not her best friend. I do not mean that in a possessive type way but rather in a supportive type way ... I am afraid that my naiveness and lack of understanding of what was really happening kept me from being the friend that she needed and deserved.
1 person likes this
@hardworkinggurl (37063)
• United States
17 May 11
I do understand because I was the type that always gave more then I received, and although some when they do try to reach out later, unfortunately in my case we have sort of outgrown our friendship. Which was a shame because in the past we were attached to one another almost to the hip.
I actually did have one oh so great girl friend who no matter what life always drew us back together and it was like we never had separated, were this way for 18 years. Sadly one day I heard her say that no matter what happens between us she knew that with me I would always come back to her.
Oddly last year I went through something really awful and am not out of the woods yet, sadly though she said she would always be there for me, one day I noticed no routine phone call and or text message that we shared in years. I went to facebook and was 
I was removed and no explanation given. Quite alright, my first reaction, is that something is apparently wrong so I called her number and no answer and or reply to my voicemail So I tried several times and still nothing.
I see a lot of happy happenings in her life in facebook and still to date no response. So I can't help but wonder, hmm I know I have not done anything wrong, so I guess the fact that my name is not attached to the big dollar signs it was a year ago, I am no use to her.
I was removed and no explanation given. Quite alright, my first reaction, is that something is apparently wrong so I called her number and no answer and or reply to my voicemail So I tried several times and still nothing.
I see a lot of happy happenings in her life in facebook and still to date no response. So I can't help but wonder, hmm I know I have not done anything wrong, so I guess the fact that my name is not attached to the big dollar signs it was a year ago, I am no use to her. 6 people like this
@gloryacam (5540)
• Philippines
17 May 11
I do care for my friends, but I'm not really vocal about it. Offline or online friends. But, when a friend says he/she needs help, I try to help. I'm a bit cautious making friends online, so I rarely share personal information. There are friends here at mylot who come and go. And, I wonder why they're gone. But, I don't think I'd go looking for them. I have come to accept that people here just come and go.
2 people like this
@gloryacam (5540)
• Philippines
17 May 11
I think I know what you mean. I'm a bit hesitant to make close friends, too. But once you become one, you're stuck with me. I have form several deep friendships that no matter how long and how far separated we are, I think about this friend constantly and wonder how he/she is. And, when we do meet, it is as if no time passed between that time and the last time we met. The connection is immediate.@hardworkinggurl (37063)
• United States
17 May 11
As one member posted here that she loves someone dearly and although they parted their ways she loves her from a distance because it is the way it has to be, I think of her words and it tells me how sincere she is.
I hope to date glory all is going well at your work.
3 people like this
@hardworkinggurl (37063)
• United States
17 May 11
Hi glorycam
myLot does make it so convenient for us to come and go at just about any time, day or night. I completely understand about conveying any personal information because sometimes we just do not know who we are actually speaking to since many times we really do not get to meet the person face to face during the entire time we know them online.
Sometimes I do wonder about offline friends and true friends though, that we can get so busy and not take a second out. But I am so old fashion in the sense that I try not to loosely get too close unless we have really gotten to know another, then we are kind of stuck with each other. lol
myLot does make it so convenient for us to come and go at just about any time, day or night. I completely understand about conveying any personal information because sometimes we just do not know who we are actually speaking to since many times we really do not get to meet the person face to face during the entire time we know them online.
Sometimes I do wonder about offline friends and true friends though, that we can get so busy and not take a second out. But I am so old fashion in the sense that I try not to loosely get too close unless we have really gotten to know another, then we are kind of stuck with each other. lol3 people like this
@changjiangzhibin89 (16686)
• China
17 May 11
I feel that you are a kindly person that takes friend seriously.To be frank with you,some people here say yes and mean no.On the other hand,perhaps somebody was really tired of the site and took French leave.Don't take it to your heart,do what is right in your own sight.
2 people like this
@hardworkinggurl (37063)
• United States
17 May 11
Hi changjiangzhibin89
So true I will carry on and continue to be sincere and always wish anyone leaving out of my life that they continue to be well.
It is sad that some say yes when they mean no because everyone would truly be sincere. I am the same online as I am offline and that is to be sincere amongst anyone I can truly call a friend.
Thanks for responding.
So true I will carry on and continue to be sincere and always wish anyone leaving out of my life that they continue to be well.
It is sad that some say yes when they mean no because everyone would truly be sincere. I am the same online as I am offline and that is to be sincere amongst anyone I can truly call a friend.
Thanks for responding. 5 people like this
@hardworkinggurl (37063)
• United States
5 Sep 11
Yes there are times when some online sites do not interest us as much as we thought it might. But here on myLot I do enjoy my time here and all the friends I have created.
I also enjoy that many come here and share their life with us as I do too.
5 people like this
@changjiangzhibin89 (16686)
• China
25 Aug 11
Hardworkinggurl and dupremo,mylot is a small society where every myloter plays the part that he or she used to play in daily life.The style is the man.
1 person likes this
@whengcat (1457)
• Philippines
16 May 11
Hello there,
Don't be so sad, maybe they just have something going on with their lives and too occupied to even bade goodbye for a while....Who knows, one day, you'll be surprised, they'll return as better as always. I like the way you value friendship. Even if we don't see each other, I think and feel that you are very nice and sincere. I hope that all of my friends are like you
2 people like this
@hardworkinggurl (37063)
• United States
17 May 11
So true whengcat,
True friendships tend to find their way if even withing the fond spiritual memories.
3 people like this
@whengcat (1457)
• Philippines
17 May 11
Well, not much really. You see I'm not much of a sociable one, I'm more of a private person. Even here in our place, our neighbors think that I'm a snob but I'm not. I have had friends when I was working at a company but it seems that when we parted ways they tend to forget also. Only a few tried to keep in touched, it's kind'a sad but I tried to look on the brighter side of it. Maybe they are too busy to make their life much better. I know they don't forget, and I will always stay in their memory as they stay in mine. They will meet new friends along the way but the memories of an old friendship will stay in their hearts
2 people like this
