Do You Need The Words?

@bluesa Only you can judge that. If he seems bothered by you trying to make friends, then my decision based on his reaction, would be just be civil. I would not pursue it. I do not know what he is thinking..so hard to say. I was just estimating on what might be the cause of his curtness.

@TiarasOceanView , he has been through a lot of bad, and so really thinks that one word is a lot from him. And I get that it probably is. I want to put a smile on his face but then that is on me. While I get one word I will be there for him. If he goes silent then I know he has shut off completely. I must be slightly nutty I swear.

@TiarasOceanView , do you mean I should stop trying to be his friend? Or I must accept him as he is? And understand that he is the way he is?

@DianneN , yes sometimes actions do speak louder than words and him being through a lot has indeed added to him being withdrawn. I know your husband shows you each day how special you are to him, Dianne, and that is wonderful.

@bluesa Just be patient with your friend. Thank you. I'm very lucky to have such a wonderful husband and doesn't he know it! As a matter of fact, he just stopped by to kiss and hug me. We told each other how much we love each other!!!!

@DianneN you both have something really wonderful and precious. Thank you, Dianne, I will try for patience.

@bluesa Not too shabby, no. How about, "we'll have to stop meeting like this"?

@Orson_Kart , yes, that is indeed a good one, the "we'll have to stop meeting like this"

Hmmm @Orson_Kart , now that is one to ponder... How about, "morning, yet again, fellow human being" . Not too shabby, eh?

@Courtlynn , I prefer that too. That is why I am struggling with this.

@bluesa right.

@luispas that's it, he doesn't have to be so literal with the actions speak louder than words bit. I have tried talking to him. I guess I will have to try again

@luispas thank you. It is worth a try.

@bluesa Yes it is, the best it's to try again, maybe this time he tells you what is really happening to him

Thank you so much @ladyankh3909 . I will think about going a bit quiet myself and see if he notices . Even if he is just a friend, I should probably try to be more understanding if he shuts down.

@ladyankh3909 you have a very good balance in your relationship from what you tell me. It's so rare for couples today to really communicate. I understand you being willing to be as patient as possible. All I can do for my friend though is try to be there and remind myself he has been through a lot. If his withdrawal becomes too much for me, I might have to pull away a little myself and hope that it snaps him out of it a bit.

@bluesa That is something I struggle with every day, almost, is trying to be more understanding of my partner's moods, simply because he's extremely understanding of mine. It's rather a very new relationship for me, the grownup ones I'd always actually wanted but never really experienced before. True ohana will always be there, no matter what, all through the worst so the best will be worth it, and he has always been there for me, in all the big ways that count, pretty much, but just as importantly, in all the little ways that matter just as much. He not only tells me he loves me, that I am wanted, and that he cares, but he SHOWS me every day, as well. It's just an automatic with us that we will always at least try to listen to each other, talk about stuff, make important decisions together, not hide stuff, be honest, try to communicate our needs and wants, and just always have each other's six, basically. He's got my back, always there, and I do the same. It's automatic. The least i can do is try to be more understanding, simply for all he DOES do for me, and I just have to remind myself of that fact on the worst days, when his withdrawel starts to get to me.

@bluesa Does he suffer from depression?

Yes @1hopefulmam I am finding it more difficult each day to try to be there for him.

@1hopefulman I won't say depression, but he is a very hard person. Won't give an inch. Maybe he could have depressive moods, but I am not certain.

@bluesa I hope that this person do change

@Nawsheen , that is sometimes how I feel too. Now trying to see it from another angle.

@Nawsheen thank you, so do I.

@bluesa This is what I think, a couple more words, and the time to offer a sincere smile.

@LadyDuck it should be that way

I know, Anna, I also say that, that if he cares as he says, he would make a bit more of an effort, maybe two words instead of one. @LadyDuck I think I am not sure if he cares at all.

@bluesa Exactly, people like that can bring you down with them.

@jaboUK I know Janet, I might have to walk away from trying to be there for him. To keep myself sane.

@jaboUK , he definitely doesn't have nice manners. I am trying to add a bit of light to his life, so to speak, silly, I know. I just have to make sure he doesn't end up extinguishing my light in the process...

@Freelanzer , oh boy, am I feeling your words today! Just one word does not take forever type, there is no reason to not return a greeting or say thanks.

@jillybean1222 , I can only imagine. Thank goodness it only happened once. Good he is saying Love you

@ridingbet , Yes, I might have to do exactly that. Leave the friendship and go on with my life. Even though I worry about him.

@ridingbet I have known him since I was young. And no romance, But I do care about him. It's fine, I don't mind the question.

@bluesa is he a good friend? or was there romance between the 2 of you? sorry for asking a very personal question.

@GrayCats , that is the problem, I know I have to understand where he is coming from, it's just I would like him to realise he must try to understand me too and right now it is coming to an impasse, even as just friends.

@shaggin , he sounds as puzzling as the Mr. I am dealing with. You're right, if this guy you know doesn't want someone to comment on stuff he posts, why post them. All very puzzling.

Hi, Sol! Good to see you . Apparently we do @sol_cee . yeah that whole flat/round thing.

I will try to accept that @shivamani10 .

Yeah, @Kandae11 , and this is very much the case with him. I have to accept it, but sometimes I think I can't stand his way of showing or making an effort.