Please share your thoughts on my song?
@VivaLaDani13 (60794)
Perth, Australia
March 2, 2019 12:15am CST
Hey everyone. I know I've got to answer you all back on my previous post and you know I will. 
I just wanted to share a song with you that I'm working on.
Please keep in mind that these lyrics go with music. It's not a poem. This is a song so if any lines seem longer than they should, it's because the words are sung in a way to make them fit in tune. It still needs some work on it.
It's about a girl who deliberately surrounded herself with emotional walls to protect herself from anymore hurt. But a man appears (seeps through the cracks) and shows her that she can be loved.
Would love to hear your thoughts. All suggestions and advice are welcome. Thank you in advance.
***********************************************************************
Brick by brick, stone by stone let the walls around me grow
To keep my heart safe from the people I don't know
Locked away in the dark is where I felt I should be
No lights shinning here so they can't see me
Each brick represents who broke my heart in two
I kept my walls growing high and then I met you
*CHORUS*
What is that spark?
I said "Leave me alone now, I'm the girl in the dark!"
Then you appeared.
I said "What are you doing? How did you get in here?"
Step by step, day by day I let my walls come down
Slowly but surely while you were around
Used to hear the crumbling of my own breaking heart
But now I hear the sounds of the walls coming apart
You make every day a reason for me to smile
Heart is mending when I look into your eyes
*CHORUS*
I can feel the spark, you grabbed my hand and pulled me out of the dark
And I as I looked around, my bricks and stones were all over the ground
My heart is beating fast, I'm feeling something I've never felt in the past
You're not like those I've known, you make me fly higher than any wall I've grown
You make me feel higher than any wall I've grown
You make me feel happier than any man I've known.
I just wanted to share a song with you that I'm working on.
Please keep in mind that these lyrics go with music. It's not a poem. This is a song so if any lines seem longer than they should, it's because the words are sung in a way to make them fit in tune. It still needs some work on it.
It's about a girl who deliberately surrounded herself with emotional walls to protect herself from anymore hurt. But a man appears (seeps through the cracks) and shows her that she can be loved.
Would love to hear your thoughts. All suggestions and advice are welcome. Thank you in advance.
***********************************************************************
Brick by brick, stone by stone let the walls around me grow
To keep my heart safe from the people I don't know
Locked away in the dark is where I felt I should be
No lights shinning here so they can't see me
Each brick represents who broke my heart in two
I kept my walls growing high and then I met you
*CHORUS*
What is that spark?
I said "Leave me alone now, I'm the girl in the dark!"
Then you appeared.
I said "What are you doing? How did you get in here?"
Step by step, day by day I let my walls come down
Slowly but surely while you were around
Used to hear the crumbling of my own breaking heart
But now I hear the sounds of the walls coming apart
You make every day a reason for me to smile
Heart is mending when I look into your eyes
*CHORUS*
I can feel the spark, you grabbed my hand and pulled me out of the dark
And I as I looked around, my bricks and stones were all over the ground
My heart is beating fast, I'm feeling something I've never felt in the past
You're not like those I've known, you make me fly higher than any wall I've grown
You make me feel higher than any wall I've grown
You make me feel happier than any man I've known.8 people like this
10 responses
@LadyDuck (472024)
• Switzerland
3 Mar 19
@VivaLaDani13 I only uploaded a video composed with photos in YouTube, I never tried to upload a video.
2 people like this
@VivaLaDani13 (60794)
• Perth, Australia
3 Mar 19
@LadyDuck I don't even know how to do all that lol I want to make YouTube videos one day but I can tell already that I'm going to be stressed about it because I need to learn all about it. Hopefully it isn't too complicated!
2 people like this
@VivaLaDani13 (60794)
• Perth, Australia
3 Mar 19
@LadyDuck Thank you! I do have a video but sadly I can't publish it anywhere unless I get this YouTuber's permission. I found music / instrumental music on YouTube and I just started singing and went from there. We shall see. Maybe sometime down the track I can hire someone to put music to it so it's more mine.
2 people like this
@MommyOfEli2013 (84192)
• Rupert, Idaho
3 Mar 19
I like the lyrics, very nice work! I can already hear a tune....so would be awesome to hear this to music :)
2 people like this
@VivaLaDani13 (60794)
• Perth, Australia
3 Mar 19
@MommyOfEli2013 Thank you very much! I have music for it but it's not mine. I'm trying to find a recording app or site or something so I can sing over the music and record it together. My brother downloaded something for me but I'm having trouble using it.
2 people like this
@VivaLaDani13 (60794)
• Perth, Australia
3 Mar 19
@MommyOfEli2013 It's all good. Thank you. I will try think of something to record on. Most likely my phone. But that can be a battle trying to make sure my voice is loud enough for the music or the music isn't too soft. Oh...fun fun fun!
I will try think of something to record on. Most likely my phone. But that can be a battle trying to make sure my voice is loud enough for the music or the music isn't too soft. Oh...fun fun fun!2 people like this
@MommyOfEli2013 (84192)
• Rupert, Idaho
3 Mar 19
@VivaLaDani13 My pleasure :) And that's good you do have music for it though, and that'd be fun to sing the lyrics. Sorry you are having trouble using the thing that he downloaded though
2 people like this
@1hopefulman (45120)
• Canada
2 Mar 19
"I said "What are doing? How did you get in here?"" This sentence doesn't make sense to me.
It is a very good song as far as the words and the message is concerned. Do you have a great tune to go with it? Make a video of you singing the song and put it in YouTube for all to enjoy.
2 people like this
@1hopefulman (45120)
• Canada
3 Mar 19
@VivaLaDani13 I think that you mean to say: What are you doing? "What are doing" is not the right expression.
2 people like this
@1hopefulman (45120)
• Canada
3 Mar 19
@VivaLaDani13 There is problem with what you are saying. It is this line. "What are doing?" Is that an expression?
I hope things work out for you. Have you copyrighted the song?
2 people like this
@VivaLaDani13 (60794)
• Perth, Australia
3 Mar 19
@1hopefulman It means she is questioning his purpose for being around her. She just expects people who comes close to her to hurt her so she is questioning why he is trying to come into her life.
Thank you! I actually don't know how to do that. I've been meaning to figure that out for many years but not sure how to do that.
2 people like this
@wanghui (894)
• China
4 Mar 19
i like this sentence specially" You make me feel higher than any wall I've grown"
i think it is really love's feeling,love make us powerful.
i think everyone have a wall like this untill the right porson appeared,Brick by brick, stone by stone,and Step by step, day by day ,that is the course of love.
2 people like this
@VivaLaDani13 (60794)
• Perth, Australia
5 Mar 19
@wanghui Thank you so much for reading and your positive feedback. Made me feel really good!
2 people like this
@sunrisefan (28524)
• Philippines
3 Mar 19
You made the lyrics of your song so well, Ms. Dani, and I'm sure this comes along with a very good tune. 
2 people like this
@VivaLaDani13 (60794)
• Perth, Australia
3 Mar 19
@sunrisefan That would be awesome! I Wish!
2 people like this
@sunrisefan (28524)
• Philippines
3 Mar 19
@VivaLaDani13 You're welcome, Ms. Dani. It would be nice if that music composition of yours goes into a studio recording. Or you might put it on Spotify.
2 people like this
@Hannihar (130213)
• Israel
3 Mar 19
@VivaLaDani13
Very interesting Dani. It is like someone pulled you out of the dark and taught you how to feel again. Am I right?
2 people like this
@VivaLaDani13 (60794)
• Perth, Australia
3 Mar 19
@Hannihar Yeah pretty close. I started putting up these emotional walls since a very young age. I lost trust in people quite early and kept getting scared off time and time again from people hurting me. But physically and emotionally. But then someone made me see that I deserved to be treated right.
2 people like this
@VivaLaDani13 (60794)
• Perth, Australia
3 Mar 19
@Hannihar Aw thank you very much! 
I am sorry that you know the feeling I'm talking about! It's not a nice feeling at all!
I am sorry that you know the feeling I'm talking about! It's not a nice feeling at all!2 people like this
@Hannihar (130213)
• Israel
3 Mar 19
@VivaLaDani13
I am sorry that you suffered so but I am glad that someone reached out to you to see that you are worth it all. I am happy that someone showed you another side. You are a very good caring person and very sweet too. I understand very well what you have been feeling.
2 people like this
@VivaLaDani13 (60794)
• Perth, Australia
3 Mar 19
@Shavkat Thank you very kindly! 
2 people like this
@Shavkat (140110)
• Philippines
3 Mar 19
@VivaLaDani13 You are very much welcome.
1 person likes this
@TiarasOceanView (70022)
• United States
2 Mar 19
You could get a deal with this a recording deal!!
2 people like this
@Daljinder (23236)
• Bangalore, India
6 Mar 19
What music you are talking about in your other comments? You can message the YouTuber for asking permission. Sometimes all they ask for is to cite the source of the music. Meaning giving credit where it is due within your song video.
1 person likes this
@VivaLaDani13 (60794)
• Perth, Australia
7 Mar 19
@Daljinder I was thinking that but because it's only for personal use right now, ( meaning this song is for someone in particular ) I won't message him asking permission for it. But if I want to upload it publicly then I will.
1 person likes this
@VivaLaDani13 (60794)
• Perth, Australia
3 Mar 19
@attri19 There is music with it but it's not my music. Sometimes I pick free music via YouTube like instrumental music done by YouTubers and I put words to it. But if I wanted to do something with my lyrics then I would hire someone to put music to my song since I can't publish this song with the music that's with it right now.
1 person likes this
