If your 16 yr. old daughter ran away with a 21 yr. old boy,...?
By kbkbooks
@kbkbooks (7022)
Canada
December 31, 2006 2:44pm CST
Would you press charges on the boy? This is legally kidnapping and may involve statuatory rape. A girl in our neighborhood left town three days ago with her boyfriend who is 21, and she is only 16. I remember being 16 and in love, and I surely would have followed my boyfriend anywhere. Fortunately for me, he was a pretty solid guy. This girl was missing over 24 hours. Her parents called the police. They didn't have his license number but they knew what car he drove and they knew his name. The police were able to find the young couple and bring her home. I believe her mother will press charges against the boyfriend. If it were my daughter, and she did the same thing under those same circumstances, I for sure would press charges. In this case, I don't know the boy personally, but as far as I am concerned, the fact he would take a girl to run away like that means he is just plain scum.
Give me your opinion. I don't have any say what happens to this boy or my friends daughter. It just brought up a lot of things for me to think about even as a mom of sons.
11 people like this
42 responses
@cheko252 (73)
• United States
31 Dec 06
Its complicated to decide because nobody knows the guy. Girls that age tend to fall for an older guy, especially one that will show them love, or what they call love. If the mother did press charges, the daughter would be mad, and most likely run away from her mom for breaking up her relationship. I say the mom needs to talk to her daughter about the dangers of being alone, or even with somebody at that age and what should be her top concerns in the first place.
@kareng (61740)
• United States
31 Dec 06
You have a good point. Having the boy arrested or charged would infuriate the girl. This could cause major rebellion at home. Of course, parents have to be parents and don't always see or think about these things and end up with a bigger problem than they began with.
This is a sticky situation. The girl needs counseling. Does the mother have a good relationship with the daughter? If not, then outside counseling should be sought. This too, may be rejected by a stubborn teenager.
1 person likes this
@satyamss (870)
• India
1 Jan 07
if ur frn wanna charge..first of all charge her daughter...then try to think abt the actions against that guy...and first of all, try to get the truth..is she raped, is she forced to ran away...if she followed that guy with her will.....and both are happy....then what were the reasons....they did this....and then think to charge...but as i think charges are not muct for changes....
@sbeauty (5865)
• United States
31 Dec 06
I definitely would press charges. The 21-year-old is old enough to know what he is and isn't allowed to do with a 16-year-old girl. He needs to be taught a lesson before he does the same thing with another young girl. The girl also needs to find out what happens when people break the law.
2 people like this
@GardenGerty (160949)
• United States
31 Dec 06
I would press charges, because if the guy is not scum, he is stupid for putting himself in that position. In some states,if the minor is over 16 it is not statuatory rape but something like contributing to the deliquency of a minor or lewd conduct. Whatever it is defined as is what I would go for. When I was young they used to say if a girl was barefoot in her boyfriend's car it was statuatory rape, but that may have been a myth. You, of course are raising your sons to both know better and do better thatn this.
@taruha (559)
• United States
31 Dec 06
your neighbor must press charges on that boy who is guilty of taking 16 year girl under the pretext of love.The way in which the tins think todayis showing red lamp to all of us as to in which direction our society is going.we must teach our teens not to do such thing.how we will do that is really a question.but, once you have decided to teach this,the ways will come for sure.
@bryelee (451)
• United States
31 Dec 06
a 21 year old is not a boy, he would be a man so yes I would press charges. I agree with you, I would press charges right away. Why is this guy dating a 16 year old, could it be he is to immature for woman his own age. I bet he is a pathetic loser who dates young girls becasue they don't know better.
2 people like this
@crystal8577 (1466)
• United States
1 Jan 07
Darn straight we would press charges. Unless they were married this is inexcusable in my eyes. I would expect him to have more common sense at 21 then to let a 16 year old run away with him. I would have a rough time with my 16 year old duaghter running around with a 21 year old guy to begin with.
@jesi06 (279)
• United States
1 Jan 07
I truly hope she CAN press charges. When I was 14 I met a guy who became my "boyfriend" he was 23. My mom tried like h*** to keep me away from him, but beings that I "knew it all" I didn't listen and the police did nothing. Said as long as I agreed to go with him there was nothing they could do. Of course we ended up getting married and stayed together for 11 VERY long years. He was abusive and controlling and I felt for YEARS there was NO WAY to get away from this man. I am "free now" but most DEFINITELY I would press charges if able to on this man. I have a 14 year old daughter now and I see alot of men even as old as 30s try to "speak to her" I am like a pittbull in the attack mode with these fools. They as adults have NO BUSINESS with these young girls. They basically seem to want young girls so they can control their ways. Sorry if I have offended anyone,this is my opinion because of not only my personal experience, but the experiences of other women I have known in the same types of relationships.
1 person likes this
@jenbatres (799)
• United States
3 Jan 07
You said the girl ran away -- that means she left on her own freewill. . .I think the situation will become worse if the parents press charges. The girl will hate her parents more and might even run away again, next time she might not be found so easily.
1 person likes this
@marilyn290384 (13)
•
1 Jan 07
Over hear we are at the legal age of concent at 16. At the aige of sixteen i dated a twenty year old and i feel at 16 years love is such a pasionate powerful thing. I know that if m mum pressed charges against my partner, who i'm still with may i add. It would have ruined my relationship with my mother, no one else. I think the fact they felt they had to run away says more about her family that the boy in question. I believe that at 16 you have to be allowed to explore your emotions and this girl obviously believes she loves her boyfriend and he must her to put himself in the firing line. I think that five years age difference is nothing as girls are more menatally mature than boys. I think the poor couple need to be given a break and charges dropped. However i am a mother of both a boy and a girl and i can see where her parents are coming from. But you have to think of how alive and exciting love is when your that age and it puts it into perspective.
1 person likes this
@babray06 (1787)
• India
1 Jan 07
There is nothing wrong in pressing charges against the boy but we have to keep in mind that before pressing charges the mother needs to talk to the girl concerned. In case if she doesn't support mother's view and say she willingly left home then the position will change. Moreover these early years are very important for a girl. They shape the future so I will suggest the mother should talk to the girl and try to make her understand her point of view (mother).
@nancygibson (3736)
• France
1 Jan 07
In the UK the age of consent is 16, so this wouldnt be an issue, they could legally marry if they chose. I presume its a different age where you are. Either way, he needs a serious talking to, she is a lot younger than him and may not have conpletely understood what she was doing
1 person likes this
@kgwat70 (13387)
• United States
1 Jan 07
I would definitely call the police and press charges on the boy since he is an adult and should know that this is illegal and can be faced with multiple charges since she is still a minor. Who knows what would be going on with the two people but you are right rape could be in there as well as kidnapping and other crimes. Parents should educate their children about situations like this and the consequences involved.
1 person likes this
@posterman (37)
• Indonesia
1 Jan 07
this is pure criminal, let the justice do their job, and wait for the result
1 person likes this
@sweetstacy (159)
• Philippines
1 Jan 07
i am so ashamed to admit this...but i was in the exact same situation years ago.i also ran away with my boyfriend and my parents also had the police come after us,but i went home,me and my boyfriend are still together now but they're not in good terms with my mom,after all these years.my mom wanted to press charges bec. i was 16 then and my boyfriend was 20 but my uncle (who was a lawyer) told her that since i was very inlove with the guy i might testify that it was my will to go with him etc.,so it would be a waste of time if my mom would press charges..not mentioning the shame my family would get if i go against them,which at that time i was very prepared to do.but now i have matured,and i have learned to tackle situations calmly,so hope my story helps a bit..good luck on your neighbor!!
