why do people do this?

This is funny my partner and I were just having this discussion yesterday. I have always worked outside of the home until five months ago. Now I stay at home with the kids and love it but you are so right. I made the comment last night that I was lucky when I worked out of the home because I had sick days. Now if I don't feel good it doesn't matter, the work still has to be done. He just looked at me and said now you know what your sister complains about all the time. He is right, I never understood until I became unemployed and we decided that I would just stay home and take care of the kids.

I understand where you are coming from, my wife is a stay at home mom, and she bust her butt to keep the house clean get 3 kids off to school, then prepares snacks, dinner, activities. It is like a full time job.

My wife is a stay at home mom, and she also watches a neighbor kid. She does plenty! The poor lady is always busy. In fact it is 9:30 now and she is so tuckered out that she is sleeping on the couch. It think that it is really sad how women (and men for that matter) who stay home and raise a family do not get the credit that they deserve. They are raising a children... the most important job in the whole world if you ask me. And throw on top of that, maintaining a house... Everyone knows that a house always needs to be picked up, and if you have kids it only adds to that. I think that most people think that stay at home moms do nothing all day is because they just don't know what they do. People tend to just use their own imagination if they do not understand what actually goes on. Chiquita, I salute you! You keep on keeping on, and do the best that you can... you have my support!

I was a stay at home mom for a while, years ago. Not having an adult conversation all day is really hard. The squabbles and health issues can get depressing. When your kids get older you might miss being at home. Not because the kids were little, but because having the time toyourself that you don't have whent he kids are younger, is a blessing to your mental health.

i know what you mean.people are always like i wish i didnt have to work and could sit home allday.i say i wish i was working lol.i always say why dont you try sitting home with 3 kids and cleaning and cooking all day long.

Luckily I have a very supportive husband who understands, and sometimes even cleans, cooks, and does everything when he gets home from work. I kept house for a year and did everything possible to make life easier for him, this time around I am trying to work part time and still play the role of a stay at home mom because I only work a few days a week. I am also pregnant again and exhausted all the time. I have been considering giving up my job because we don't need the money and I just took it on as something extra to do to get me out of the house. My husband is supportive, but yet a lot of my friends don't understand and act as though I am lazy and just have no drive to do anything in life and I can't keep a job. I quit my last job because it was the first time I had been back to work since I had my son and married my husband, and it was hard never seeing him or spending time with him after we used to spend basically all day together. I admit it wasn't the smartest move, but people don't understand that if you don't need the job it is so much easier to give it up. I think stay at home moms do so much more than people think, and deserve more credit than a lot of people who work "full time" and sit at a desk all day and really don't do anything. (Not saying everyone who sits at a desk don't do anything)

I agree people don't realize how much work being a mom and home maker is. I don't get to do it full time like I wish I could because I work outside the house 4 days a week. But the three days that I spend at home with the kids I am constantly busy. For me it is alot more work when I am at home compared to when I am at my job.

I hate it also when ppl think stay at home moms do nothing. I stay home, and its hard taking care of a child by yourself 24/7. I am also a single mom. I do laundry, cook, clean, and do all the child care alone. I seriously agree with you.

I think that people make them comments because they work plus do all of them things that you named that you do. Working plus having to come home and take care of children, clean the house, cook, etc. is way much harder than just being a stay at home mom.

nice work

Sometimes I think we are taken for granted. My husband admitted that if I worked, he would probably help more around the house. But since I don't have a job that involves me leaving for more than 8 hours.... I do the driving to preschool. The driving to ballet. This spring it will be t-ball and cub scouts. I still have to help with homework. I have a child with a severe speech disorder so I've been working with that for the past 3 years. It isn't all that easy but I can't imagine doing all of that and working. But people do it. As much as I LOVE being a single mom and I do love it, I sometimes envy my husband that break he has and adult conversation. How I miss real adult conversation. But my husband was deployed to Iraq a a few years ago and I learned that when I complained about not having a break...I didn't really know what I was talking about. I had NO break then. It was only me from the time I woke the kids up, til they went to bed. It was so tiring. Cleaning, doing bills, full time mommy (2 and 4 at the time), running to preschool and speech, cooking, getting baths, getting them dressed, bed time routines...everything was all on me. It was tough and I told someone that I don't know how single working mothers or fathers do it. I couldn't keep up when I was alone during that time but to add a job to it...NO WAY!

I hear ya. I have been a stay at home dad for the past 8 years which is absolutely incomprehensible to some people. First off, they don't think it's a "real job", and they certainly don't believe that a man could possibly do it. So far, my kids have turned out just fine, so I must be doing something right. Just ignore them, the people who give you a hard time probably wouldn't last a day being a homemaker...a little too much like hard work for most.

Oh my goodness, I'm glad you started this. I'm only 19 and I'm already like a house wife and stay at home mom. I love it but boy is it work. I cxan't stand when my fiance comes home talking about how he wishes he could just sit on his butt all day and watch tv with our 2 yr old. Sorry, there is no sitting on your butt when you have a 2 yr old.

I think we are taken for granted every day. I know I am by my husband. It make me mad and honestly it makes me want to go back to work sometimes. It is the hardest job you'll ever have. I hate it when people ask me what I'm going to do that day. Do they want me to say every single thing I'm doing? Our days are filled even if we don't have activities planned. I don't sit here all day and do nothing.

Motherhood will always be the Oldest profession with the least amount of Pay for the time spent. I was never able to have kids due to health reasons, but I feel that when people make comments like this, they need to exchange places with the women who do this, and see just how hard of a job it is. I have wondered though, and marveled at women who do this, and they usually have Good kids come from this as they are there for their kids. You may not see your rewards from this now, but someday you will have kids who will Thank You for your being there.

diffently full time with no respect. but its strange they wantr switch places.

it a hip of boredom to stay home with the awarenesss that nothing rolls into your account ... but i can stay home knowing fully well that at the end of the day something comes in.i think the govt of the day sahould compensate mothers for this as t5he same children will grow up to put the economy in shape.

I have been a stay at home mom since I got pregnant with my youngest who is now 9. It's been great, of course it's been challenging at times. When my youngest was in pre k it was discovered that he had a 70% hearing loss. We started with sppech thereapy, which was 3 days a week, I took him to the doctor appointments, school, and speech therapy. All of this while taking my other 2 children where they needed to get. My oldest was in the marching band and I was the mom that would take a van full of children home from practices. When my youngest was 4 months old my mother suffered a series of heart attacks, she's living now with congestive heart failure and only the center of her heart is actually the only part still living muscle. Besides my 3 children,and my mother, I take care of a neighbors child and my mother in law who lives with us and has her own list of health problems. We also have the house that all the kids hang out at, I've been referred to as the neighborhood mom. I'm not the best housekeeper in the world but luckily I have a very loving and understanding husband who says he doesn't care as long as I take care of him, the kids and our mothers. I don't realize until I start talking or writing about it, how much I've done in 9 years. At Christmas, my older sister (who has no children) made a comment about how she and our younger sister don't have free time like I do, or that they don't get to just sit around all day. They have NO idea! I guess they just forgot that I'm the one who makes sure our mother gets to the doctor and the pharmacy and to get her blood work done. I'm proud to be a stay at home mom and I applaud all the other stay at home parents!!

Absolutely! When I worked full time in a finance department, I got more free time and more ME time than ever. Lunch with the girls, pay my bills at work, goof off, etc. Being a mommy 24/7 in charge of everything from diapers to laundry to grocery shopping. Anyone who thinks it isn't tough should try it for a week. On top of all the demands of home, stay at home moms rarely have other adult contact unlike those who work. I think it is the most stressful job I have ever had, but it is also the most rewarding and that is why I still work here!! :)

I gave up my job and chose to be a stay-at-home mom so I can tend to my 2 babies and be there watching them grow. I understand what you mean by saying people do not understand why we choose to be stay-at-home moms and think that we have the easiest tasks to do, considering we're just at home, and we can sleep and lay on the bed at whatever time we want. No, they are mistaken. We have the most difficult but most rewarding job there is, and we don't get salaries for it, plus we work 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, no day-off. I think stay-at-home moms should be given more credit because without us, our homes will not be homes.