Friendship ???

This has been something I've been thinking about lately. I'm a work at home Mom so I don't get out a lot. Most of my friends that I had before I had kids have dropped off the face of the earth it seems like. I have one friend who also has children and we are close once in a while, meaning that when she has a boyfriend she drops her friends, then when they dump her, she comes crawling back to our friendship. I hate it but I don't really have any other choices besides her where I live. I suppose if I went out and tried to join some kind of group I'd make more friends but honestly I thought I'd make some connections with the other mothers at my childrens schools but that hasn't happened. People are usually invested in their own lives and don't always want to start new friendships.

Hello ironmanx; I do see it a bit more difficult to keep up with the friends I have as well as family. Seems things are going fast. Always busy and like you, I have moved alot also. I find that it is hard to make friends more now a days, or is it as we get older? I don't know but I do make an effort to stay in touch with old friends. I do enjoy talking with them and getting the odd visit in. It is a drag when we find ourselves alone alot as I do also. I find that if I just go shopping or somewhere into public, I always find someone to strike up a conversation as I am rather talkative and if I am in the socializing mood. If you are finding yourself alone a bit too much and starts to bring you down a tad, a great way to get into a people thing is to find somewhere to volunteer every so often. The eldery, animal rescue, theraputic riding, food bank. There are numerous places. I find that I enjoy time alone more than I don't however. I can always pic up the phone and call someone. Even if it is family. Keep your chin up, think positive. If you find that you keep running into the same person when you are out and about, whom you do not know personally, perhaps stop and strike a conversation with them. I think for call backs, it helps if there is something in common. You could always take the initiative and ask them to join you for a beverage the next day or on the weekend and just meet them at a mutual agreed upon area, telling them that if they can't make it for whatever reason to please give you a call. I amreally bad for calling the people I do know, often enough. Not to mention actually getting together. Life gets busy. I figure that it is a two way street too, so others can just as easily pick up the phone. I find that when I finally do see and or talk with friends who I haven't communicated with in awhile, the reason for them is usally because life has been hectic, working lots etc. We still have fun, making up for lost time.

I don't have any problem meeting new friends ofline, but I preffer to keep old friends active. I find any reason to invite friends over. i do girls only meetings and theme meetings. Art people tends to be seen as wired. Also, you get older and you are more picky about friends selection and this is normal. Keep smiling, friends are everywhere:)

I think its harder to make new friends when you are not working. Maybe alot of the people you are meeting people who are working long hours and have a busy family life. I know that since I started working from home I have maintained friendships only with my single friends. My married buddies are busy having babies, working and worse still, they live on the other side of the city. So over all I would have to agree it is harder now but maybe you should try making a definite follow up date instead of just leaving your card. Just a thought!

certainly its nice to have friends and its not so easy to build up a relation of friendship.. But a lotz of friends are there when u feel urself friendly..

Everyone, when not online, seems to be tied to an ipod or a cell phone. they don't have time to meet new people, they're too busy living in their own digital world.

I tend to agree with you that it really is extremely difficult to find real friends offline. Most often it seems like people are either just too busy with their own lives for any new friends or we just don't have anything in common that would be enjoyable to discuss as friends. Where we live - it's full of Southern Baptists - which I don't agree with their beliefs or LDS people who come to your house and try to sell their religion on you which I am so not into that!!!! And most of the kids in our neighborhood are homeschooled and aren't even allowed to play with kids that go to school. So there really isn't anyone near me who has anything in common - such a shame these days!!!

I definatley agree that it is much harder to make new friends as you get older. Also it seems we loose friends along the way that we had so the circle gets smaller and smaller. I have done the meet friends (not dating) online to broaden my social circle thing and Ive made the effort to keep in touch with old friends and joined groups and clubs but am still in a position that I have less friends around me than I used to and it gets smaller every day. I think that we become less accepting of other peoples habits and they of ours as we age and this is what makes it harder to make and keep new friends in our lives. Also people are so busy now days just tying to keep homes and families going that they rarely have time for relaxing and socalising.

Yes I noticed it's hard to make new friends, it's even hard to keep your old friends as life separates us and everyone is busy with his own life even if still at the same city ..:( Actually I'm more on the introverted side and don't like to have many friends, I don't try to get with people or meet new friends but still it would be good if you can find some good friends sometime .. I just hate that you must know "many" people to really have a "few" friends..

I am living still where i ws bron so i don't have lost mine old friends but i do lost mine friends of school and college after finishing mine studies.But not all one them but someone who are far from meah.So i don't have any bitter experieced as you have got in your life.

My wife and I talk about this all the time. It is harder now that we are older. I think life is just so much busier and faster paced than it used to be. This makes it harder to commit to sold friendships.

I think there are several factors that play a part in the way we interact these days. For one, people can be just plain lazy when it comes to reaching out. When you think about creating a friendship with someone - a real friendship - you really need to be able to be a part of it. Also, some people have already know or are very close to many people and don't want to take on another connection due to the above - not being lazy but already putting a lot of energy into the friendships that already exist. We are a very disconnected society these days - having 'friends' online is nothing like having friends that you physically come in contact with. The first takes a lot more energy than the second, less effort as well. I'm sorry to hear that people are keeping in contact with you - I'm sure it's hard with regard to your CFS - I must admit that I have been one of those lazy people but my reason is due to the 2nd reason listed above. Keep trying - there are many folks out there who can always use some new friends!

I totally agree with you .As we grow older it becomes diffificult for us to make new friends.i have moved from my place and am in a new city now.i miss my friends a lot and i do speak to my colleagues but that finishes off with office.when i go back home i dont have anyone to go around with or speak with.it is just me and myself alone.all i do is sit around and play the guitar all day long.my new friend now is my guitar.:-)

I truly have noticed over the years that it is very hard to find a good friend now. Not that I had some when I was younger, but I thought as we all grew older and became mature adults, it would be alot easier, but boy was I wrong. i have tried to be friends with many people of all races, age and gender and none of them ever worked its self out accept for the relationship I have now with my husband but even it has been a very tough venture. It does get to the point where you think everyone is just out for themselves and that you cannot trust anyone to be your friend, but I would much rather have no friends than to have a whole bunch of fake ones.

Sorry to hear that you're going throught that. It is hard for some people to make friends. It isn't hard for me. I always make friends when I want to.

I think to meet people offline is not a problem and make a new friends are easy i think. When you dont insult the friends than your friendship is growing i think.

Not so harder. You can make Good Friends with in minutes if you try. I have made many friends and all of us now helping each other and co-operating. I am happy and Satisfied with my friends.