Homework how much is to much help, & how much is nagging?
By Ridgydidge
@Ridgydidge (558)
Australia
February 5, 2007 4:52am CST
Miss 10 soon to be Miss 11 is at it again. First week back to school we have homework. Teacher gives the homework out on a Thursday & asked that it is on his desk by the Following Wednesday. Thursday night I try to get her started on the homework. This week I worked all weekend, so rather than nag, I asked once, and told daddy she had homework to do. A small amount did get started. Today is Monday, 1 day before homework is due in, and she is asking for my help.
I don’t believe in just giving the answers to homework, (especially maths) I prefer to get Miss 10 to work it out for herself. So I answer a math question with a question by breaking the problem down to something I know she knows the answer to. Then rebuilding the problem back up again. Because I am doing this she says I’m nagging, giving too much information., I should give her the simple & short answer. The only simple & short answer I know would be THE answer, & I refuse to give that out without her trying. (that is all I ever ask is she at least tries)
Other parents or Teachers do you have any hints & tips on how you handle homework problems. Do you “leave them to it” & come in later to check the work, or sit with them the whole time & correct every mark on the paper? Is there a happy medium?
4 people like this
5 responses
@FFAgirl_16 (98)
• United States
6 Feb 07
Well, if they really want help, show them how to do it. If they don't like to be shown how, then they don't want help. What they want is for you to tell them the answer. Try to get them to refer back to the source material, be it a textbook, reading book, word list, passage, anything. Often they're just looking for the "easy answer" and could easily find it if they just looked where they were supposed to. It's not your job to have to brood over her and make sure she gets each and every single thing right, so don't worry so much! If you think she's not getting to understand it after you help, talk to her teacher and see how she's doing in class. A lot of kids seem to be able to do it when one person helps them, but not when another does. If she needs help during class, ask her teacher how he or she helps her and try the same thing. It sounds like if she's waiting until the last minute and asking you to practically give her the answers, it may be a motivation problem instead. The work may be too hard so she feels frustrated and gives up, or it may be too easy so she feels like it's a waste of her time. Whatever the case try and ask her teacher about how she is in class, because there may be something very simple you can do about it.
3 people like this
@Ridgydidge (558)
• Australia
7 Feb 07
Thankyou for your response, I don't feel so bad now.. :D
1 person likes this
@14missy (3183)
• Australia
5 Feb 07
Ouch! I hate homework. If I had my way it would be banned in all schools except for reading. Thank goodness my children don't get very much at all at their school now. I used to sit with one of my children while she did the homework and the other I would just check on every couple of minutes. We always tried to get the weeks homework out of the way in one night otherwise it just didn't get finished. Bribery is my only suggestion or not doing it at all and let her suffer the consequences. Surely she wlould be a bit embarrased if she was shown up at school for not doing it. Embarrassment works with my daughter.
@Ridgydidge (558)
• Australia
7 Feb 07
Sorry I haven't responded sooner, have just found out I am going into hospital next week, and I'm running around getting everything ready for it. I may get more Mylot time when I am recovery.
I did the embarrased thing last year... Never seemed to faze her... :D
2 people like this
@anjalisk2005 (1492)
• India
8 Feb 07
yes i help my kids with their homework but it is limited to only showing referances and formation of their work.the actual hs to be done by the son himself later i check what he did.
@whiteheather39 (24403)
• United States
6 Feb 07
I think you are dong the right thing. How will they ever learn anything, not just in homework but in all things life throws at them. They cant think that there will always be someone there with the right answer.
2 people like this
@Ridgydidge (558)
• Australia
7 Feb 07
Thanks for your response, she always winges that I go on & on.
1 person likes this
@michelledarcy (5220)
•
7 Feb 07
When I was young my dad was the same as you and wouldn't give me the answers but would teach me the method and then give me other examples to do until I got it right then make me go back and do my homework. I used to hate this and tried it on my own. When I got the work wrong I soon realised that his method is the right one if I was going to do well.
Maybe that is the way you should do it with your daughter. If she doesn't want you to help her in the way you want to then don't help her at all and then when she gets it wrong she will be asking for your help again.
Luckily my 5 year old is always enthusiastic about her homework. I'm getting her into the routine of always having to do it when she gets home so that when she gets more when she is older she will already be used to doing it.
2 people like this
@Ridgydidge (558)
• Australia
8 Feb 07
It would not be the first time I have walked out on her when she doesn’t like my methods. Then the yelling starts, saying she wants my help just not that way… lol *sigh* I’ll work a happy medium one day.
1 person likes this
