What is the best insult that you have heard?

All your responses are funny! A friend of mine used to call people Bungalow (A one story house) when I asked why he said 'cause they've got nothing up top'!

my favorite is an oldie but a goodie..."I'd love to have a battle of wits but you are obviously unarmed"

"You're about as bright as a candle in a windstorm." I made the following one up: "I had crap on the bottom of my shoe that was more impressive than you." Anyhoo. LOL

These are a few I can remember. "I'm not saying your're ugly, but when you were born did they slap your mother" "The lights are on, but no ones home" "You have such a lovely singing voice, do you sing in the key of chubb"

Did you eat paint chips when you were a kid? How many years did it take you to learn to breathe? When you fell out of the ugly tree, you hit every branch on the way down!

I like: "Have a kangaroo loose in the top paddock" "the lift doesn't go to the top floor"

"Nine cents short of a dime!" "Doesn't it hurt to keep bumping your head on the coffin lid before you go out every evening?" " You'd better put on this orange vest, they still round up wild jacka*ses here!"

It's my moms and it seems to come out of her mouth at all the most inappropriate times.....Just because you have a sharp tongue, does not mean you have a keen mind. It's not a funny one but the way she says it really packs a whollop.

Oops..another...He is from the shallow end of the gene pool.

1) He is as sharp as a bowling bowl 2) Not the sharpest tool in the shed 3) Not the sharpest knife in the drawer 4) His elevator don't go all the way to the top 5) Lights are on - nobody is home 6) His mother and father had the same last name - beofre they are married 7) If brains were dynamite, he could not blow his nose 8) He can't find his way out of a bathroom without help. 9) As useful as a screendoor in a submarine 10) As useful as a rubber crutch 11) When his eyes are open, there are lights in them taht flash the word 'vacant' 12) Oldie - he is so narrow minded he can look through a keyhole with both eyes at the same time. 13) He does the work of 3 men - Curly, Larry and Moe 14) Any similarity between him and a human is purely coincidental 15) I just worship the ground he slithers on. 16) Mine - original - It is a good thing men are a gender, if they were a species, they would not have survived 17) Mine about my son - He is an anti-honor student. 18) Did your parent's have any kids that lived? 19) He is the world's only living heart donor. 20) He is suffering from cranial-rectal inversion. SOrry can't remember any others at the moment

My husband and I were having an arguement and he turned around and said your just like my mother. He knew he was in trouble for saying that as soon as he saw the look on my face. He has never said anything like that again. We both laugh about it now though.

two sandwiches short of a picinc/ if brains were tnt you wont have enough to blow your head off/

I've heard this one before; "You're so ugly, when you were born the nurse slapped your momma!" Pretty bad taste, eh?

my fella says " she had a face like a burnt thong" or " had a head like a robbers dog "

I have a few that I love for a variety of reasons: You're a taco short of a combination platter. Has your mother come out from under the porch to bite the mailman? I could have done that but they found out my parents were married. (This one is particurally good when being snide about achievements. I heard it in a movie and thought it was great) Are you sure you aren't blond? We need some clorine in the gene pool Those are the ones that really stick out in my mind.

If brains were gasoline you wouldn't have enough to start a fire ants moped. Your IQ would almost qualify you as half of a small rock, if you studied. I'm not saying you are stupid, but, someone told me you went home to study for your urine test. Did you at least pass? Your village called, they want their idiot back. May I help you get there?

It is your right to be stupid but obviously you're abusing it! Are you always stupid or are you making a special effort today? Brains aren't anything. In fact in your case they're nothing. I don't know what makes you so dumb but it really works.

I like the one my mom used about my step dad being so cheap and tight with his money. She said "He is so tight he squeaks when he walks" If my dog was as ugly as you I would shave his butt and teach him to walk backwards. I've seen people like you, but I had to pay admission. You're so ugly you starred as King Kong's stunt double.

"You are not the sharoest knife in the drawer", "He's not stupid, he's just got bad luck thinking" the only ones I came up with atm... Loved the one: "I'd love to have a battle of wiyts but you are obviously unarmed"

"It will never be well for you and your family". Thats a pretty deep insult.another is "Lunatic that wears clothes", back here in my country you see mentally challenged destitutes on the street stark naked.