How do you not say anything????

So many people suffer that problem. They think their way is the only way. There are so many different methods of parenting and while I will agree that some are better than others, without knowing the children and the type of situation, you are right, nobody can say that their method will definitely work. Each child is different and everybody has to try and figure out what gets the most results with their own children. This is a great site to come to for advice on these matters. I sincerely hope it wasn't me who caused this rant, lol, if so, I apologize if I ever come across as making a judgment on someone. I do try to offer advice if I can and I let people know what methods worked for me with my three children.

It is human nature to judge people, it doesn't make it okay, but it is normal. Parenting decisions is one thing that people will probably always disagree on. What works for one parent and child may not work for another parent and child and it is not fair for someone to say "well if you did it this way then the kid would be better" but people still do. The only time someone SHOULD step in and say something about someone's parenting (or lack of) is when the child is putting others in danger or the child themself is in danger. Try not to let it get to you so much...people are always going to be rude, especially about parenting! :\

I'm guessing because these people will never see you in person so they think they can blast others. Believe me-- I've seen it too and it irritates me to no end. I will give my opinion on something if asked or try to help-- I never try to belittle a person for the way they do things. If I don't agree with it or don't think it's safe I will state that and my reasons why. Are any of us perfect parents?? I know I'm not- I learn more and more each day- I had a woman respond to me that I'm a lazy parent and its people like me that make terrible kids-- Have I ever heard of birth control? lol-- All because I said homework- It's not just for kids anymore-- They send home stuff for families and other things that kids cannot do alone. Go figure! You gotta love people who think it's there way or the no way!

Parenting isn't easy and no one should judge. The only thing is some people believe certain ways of raising a child is right or wrong. It's just their opinion, don't take things to heart. People don't always agree with the way I am a parent on the count of me being too strict. I've been called an army mom, but at least I know my children won't get out of line. Just do what you feel is best.

I agree...I am not sure what you are talking about SPECIFICALLY, but I have seen posts on this site and others where people will tell other people that their way is right and that's it...that's not true! I will give an example of MY parenting skills coming into question. Going thru Walmart and my kid is asking for every single thing they can see! I say "no, no, don't ask me again, no" about 455 times! LOL The 456th time, I reach over and spat him on the rear and yell out at him to stop asking or I'll take him the bathroom...blah blah...well, YES...for someone who just walked up on the situation may think "wow, what a bad mom"...BUT, they weren't there for that last 45 min when I was saying no, no, no...and threatening him and giving him "one more chance". LOL I got bad looks from a lady for this...my response is to just smile and go on beecause she DOES NOT know! I try to keep this philosophy with myself, too. When I am in a store and hear a mom jump on her kid for something that I may think is small, I keep in mind that I haven't been with that kid for the past hour! Who's to say this isn't the 1000th time this mom has said "no"? LOL

I know I for one have never said that my way of parenting is the best. Heck I'm still learning and I have one who is already 18, but all children are different. My 8 year old and 3 year old are nothing like my oldest daughter so they have to be treated differently. I know if someone asks my opinion on something, I try my best to tell them what my experience was at that stage and hope that it helps them with what they are going through. I know I have to go through the teenage years 2 more times and at such different times with my other children that I'm dreading them all over again. I think that each parent can only do their best and help others with what knowledge we have gained from our own experiences.

Me and my hubby have been judged by so many neighbors etc. That I think we are used to it by now.

I understand exactly what you are saying. Some people on this site do make judgements about others and it is very nerve recking. You can't let other people's ignorance upset you though. This world is so full of judgemental people who don't understand that the only judgement of a person's lifestyle that matters is GODS.

I am so glad you feel better. You are so right about attitudes people have. I never feel like my way is best. Heck, I have made so many mistakes in life that I have no right to judge. If I give an opinion, I just put down what worked for me. No one is better than anyone else. They just think they are.

I know where you are coming from. I guess it's ok to be opinionated (to a point) but you must realize that you are not perfect and that your opinion may not always be the right one. You will find that on parenting for sure. Some people feel so passionately that their way is the right way. I think people should be more open minded but there is always a few in every bunch that have to spoil it and be down right rude.

If one shares his own experience with children HERE, than I think that everybody are welcome to judge. Otherwise there will be no point in telling anything about anything here. That's what this is - A PUBLIC FORUM. And this is PERSONAL INFORMATION. If one gets offended by other people's oppinions and judgements... he, himself is to blame. People are free to say anything - just as the person who shares information is free to do that.

well,first of all, kids dont come with instructions!!! boy i sure wished they did when i was raising mine!!! parenting is an experiment becuase the kids dont come with instructions and raising them is like an experiment. if it works great if it dont then try something else, thats what u do with experiments right???what may work for you may not wrok for someone else. maybe that person meant well.in some cases maybe someone is the better parent, but it depends on the situation i think, try not to be to harsh on that person. im glay u feel better now...

Yes, I know what you mean, however, this has been going on since the beginning of time hasn't it. It is called being a free person to think and feel how you chose, and I just can not believe that you haven't done it yourself. Made judgements on others for what ever reason. To get upset over such things is to worry over things you have no control over, an exercise in futility.

Judging is a character trait of every human being. It's how we distinguish what we think is good and bad. Our preferences and principles maybe different but we still do one universal thing, to judge. Not only people but practically everything we see or come in contact with. Even our justice system has this condition. I think you're more angry about the idea of being misjudged rather than being judged. What if people judge you as a good person, will that make you feel bad? Of course not.

i think it is just human nature who already fall into sin... we always think that we are the only one who is perfect and right and other people are wrong... we always tend to see other people's fault rather than their goodness... we always try to find a scapegoat to cover our mistakes... i think these characters are unavoidable except we the creation go back again to our Creator and start to learn the truth... and the truth that will set you free...

i know what you mean and as a mum it is very annoying to feel like im being judged but my lot is a discussions forum and if people didnt have an opinion it probably wouldnt leave them with much to say.you just have to take the ones you dont like with a pinch of salt.

I didn't understand you, but I comfort you.

How we perceive what others are intending by what they write can be quite difficult. Some people are just very straightforward and opinionated anytime they say anything. It's not that they mean to be judgmental, but we are also being judgmental when we bring our accusations of their opinions to the table. I agree that a simple statement of our perspective does not have to include an indictment of theirs. For a good article on relating to a teenage daughter you might try http://helium.com/tpc/11897. This article and some others on this topic are presented fairly and openmindedly for the most part. If we stick with the topic and don't try to make it a personal attack, it always works better. I agree that we need to keep from attacking the other person. I do suppose that there are times when it does seem like they've thrown down the glove and are inviting someone to challenge them.

"I've been reading through some discussions and what gives people the right to think they can judge someone else?" That would be the first Amendment of the U.S. Constitution, I believe. I get what you're saying--it stems from people wanting to be the best at everything they do. Humans have that damned inferiority complex that mucks up everything.

Wow! hey, chill out! =) Parenting for me is like having your own opinion. Everyone is entitled their own opinion and with parenting, every parents have their own style in raising their kids. As always, because of your own style or opinion, you'll know if your ways are right or wrong at the end depending on how your kids grow or become. With the judgement, we can't get it off of our lives but what we can do is just to listen and listen but not to have it deep in our minds and our hearts. Who knows?! You might get something useful from those judgements...