asking your partner to "babysit"!

I too am home all day with my children and now that you say it i find that i do the same thing i ask my hubby to "babysit" if i want to go out whether it be for me time or to run errands im not sure why i do it, its not like he can or will say no but i guess im so use to be their primary caregiver that it feels as if im finding them a sitter

When I was growing up, my dad always referred to it as babysitiing when he watched us. Its just an phrase from the days when women were expected to take care of the children all the time...I dont know if much has changed.

No I refuse to ask him to "babysit" my son. I just tell him that I'm going out and leave. Half the time they will just up and leave to just go and "hang out". My son is his little shadow, and everywhere my bf goes he wants the baby to follow. Actually, sometimes I feel like neglected.

I do not have any kids, but my friend has a bf that she has to ask, but he is most of the time not doing it. he is a really horrible man and she should leave him, it is like sje´s all alone anyways!

My sisters do the same thing. Why should they have to ask their husbands to watch the kids? He helped create the creatures, so he should help watch them. When I want to do something with my sisters, they always say, "I have to see if he can watch them or if grandma can". Why is having children a life sentence for the woman? I had it easy. I didn't have any kids of my own. I just raised his son. With us it was the other way around. He had to ask me to watch his kid when he wanted to go out. I just said bye and left!

I can't believe that people still call it "baby sitting" when it is thier child. I mean how do you baby sit your own child. I never ask my husband to babysit. I go when I want and so does he. It just doesn't make sense to me. I always tell him were I am going and it has never even crossed my mind to ask him to watch the kids. It is just as much his job as it is mine.

You are not alone. I do it withmy husband as well. I think it is because we are the mothers and we tend to take on more of the responsibility of taking care of the kids by choice that we feel a bit guilty going out in a way, and have to make shure that the kids are being left with a responsible adult. Plus forall we know our spouce has plans that they have forgotten to tell us about. I ask my husband because not all of my kids are also his kids. I have 4 kids total and my 2 oldest are from previous relationships so I fel thatsincethey are nothis that I have to ask him.

yes, i have asked him too. and its my time to go do something with a friend

yes, the wife really need to do that and so it's like asking permission and requesting that you need him to do it while you're out. though you two are both responsible for babysitting per ce, as it is taking care, of course as the mother, it is your primary responsibility, not the father's.

Hmm this seems a little strange to me. If your partner is the father of your child then you shouldn't have to say anything. You should be able to just say, "I'm going to take a nap so you can watch so-and-so." If he's the father he is equally responsible for the child as you are.And if he is not the father then yes you probably should ask him if he doesn't mind watching your child.

Men should also share with that task of babysitting your child. It's their kid afterall and you need a break once in a while. It's only normal for you to have a life outside of the house and your family.

I do have the same problem, but I think that it is my problem. My husband will just say he is going somewhere or just gets in the shower when he feels like it. I am always like "will you watch the boys so I can take a shower." He will always wonder why I am asking but it does seem to me that I am the one who innitiates responsibility with the children and he just waits for the cues.

I always feel like I am asking him to babysit. We have twins and it is hard to take care of them by yourself, but I do it every day! So last night I was so tired and I said "Can you handle the both of them if I go to sleep?" And he says "I hope so. If I need help I'll just yell". Um I don't want you to yell for help, that's why I asked if you can handle it! And not 2 hours into my first night of sleep since the twins came home, he wanted to take a shower, so I had 2 wide awake babies while I was half asleep. Not fair.

yes same here i do that all the time its weird lol and yet hes the same he goes out without asking me to babysit lol well we just need to rember hes the parent as wel no need 2 ask

The way i see it you shouldnt have to ask your partner to babysit. If its yur child its not babysitting its taking care of your responsibilities...

nope i dont unless its urgent...our partner are tired from work and we must note that also...we must give him some space for himself to relax in our home and a peace of mind..

I agree with MRBRANAN too. The children are ours, so we share the responsibility to take care of them. I guess I am lucky. If I want to go out, I can choose to take the children with me, or leave them to my husband. My husband never complains about watching over them. Since my husband works and I stay home, I'd remind him to spend some time with the kids because they miss him. So, don't feel bad about asking your husband/partner to take care of the children because he is spending quality time with them.

I don't ask my husband to babysit because she is his father. If you have to ask him to babysit then i think you should remind him that he helped make your beautiful bundle of joy. I think they need to spend time with the children from time to time that way they know what we go through.

I don't ask my husband to babysit because this is his child too. If i need him to do something i simply say can you or will u . If he huffs and puffs about it i remind him that we both made our child. I notice that sometimes he thinks i am suppose to be on call all the time but it is not going to happen. Usaully i dont ask him to do much but their are times when i need a break.

well, asking our partners to babysit sometimes is a good idea..we have to go out also to regain our confidence. and if our partners arent arround to baby sit, we should ask our p[arents (if they are still around) to take care of our children for just a while. and if our partners arent comfortable with them babysitting our child, we have to let them make us understand that we need too some time and space so that we could work again efficiently and effectively..