Why it that most men have no problem making babies but........

I think that the ongoing problem of not taking responsibility for our actions occurs in both males and females. It has become too easy for a parent to walk away from a child without looking back - many times the parent left holding the bag does not find out what options are available to them. The courts will award child support even if the parent does not wish to be a part of that child's life. Not only is it the responsibility of the parent who left to pay child support, but it is the responsibility of the parent with the child to use the options that are available to obtain that child support. I, too, agree that it is not fair to your husband to provide for another man's children, but if he does this willingly and is a true father to these children, kudos to him!!!

hey cmon..how many marriage did u go through??? u have 2 older kids who are not ur husbands...but they are urs na...so its ur duty to look after them...and ur burdening ur husband..so ty to find a job and help him...and stop complaining..

Well, first of all, let me say that I understand where you are coming from. But, at the same time, its not fair to say MOST men. I am in this situation right now, I am getting married to a man that is NOT my daughter's biological father, but he supports us both. He has a child of his own that he supports as well. And I agree that it should be taken care of by the children's real father's, but, as sad as it is, this will probably NEVer happen, but we should just be thankful that we have found men that love us and our children enough to step up and do what their real father's should be doing! Huggers to you!

i would like to ask what is it with women that they get demented about having a baby. i have seen women going totally beserk. Men by instinct look for 1.Financial security so that they can look after their progeny 2. a woman who will make a good mother and 3.a good housekeeper before they decide to have a kid. Women on the other hand want to start producing kids immaterial of the other realities of life.

I don't know why there are so many fathers who don't support their kids. I have 4 kids. I've been there for them since day 1.

It's probably because he didn't want kids in the first place. Was he involved in the decision of whether or not to give birth to them or did you decide that yourself? Was whether or not to have babies something the two of you had discussed and reached a decision about? I'm guessing the answer to both of those questions is no, in which case it shouldn't be much of a surprise that they aren't involved now.

What are you talking about? Men have just as much problems conceiving as women do. The only reason it seems that more women have problems is because there are more women on this planet than men, but believe me, it is common in men as well. How do I know this? My step-father cannot have children anymore thanks to his cancer. My friend's dad could not conceive because of his Type 2 Diabetes. My friend is an only child because of her dad's low sperm count. Do your research before saying anything?

whats wrong with you keeping your legs closed? it takes to dont just blame males

i think you are right @ do you think right!

well.. men are not worried to make babies as they don hav to b pregnant... it s u..u shud hav fored the to take precautions tht time.. and why did u went ahead wid having babies wid such ppl whom u knew were not faithfull ?

i think guys who dont stick arround to look after their own kids have a touch of the alley cat about them and should possibly be castrated. Extreme i know, but one of the blights on both society and childhood is men who do this kind of thing, wouldnt it be kinder all round if they could no longer do this?

I think we need to start raising our daughters to believe in themselves, and teach them to not be so dependent on having men in their lives to take care of them, rather help them see the necessity for being an equal partner in a relationship. We also need to teach them to be more choosey with the men they get involved with, because I can guarantee you that the 2 fathers of your older children gave you warning signs that they were not going to be the type of responsible partner you need to have a relationship of any kind with. Had you allowed yourself to identify those initial characteristics in those men, maybe you wouldn't have chosen to become sexually intimate with them, maybe you would have communicated before hand and learned how they felt about bringing babies into the world--the signs of non-involved parent is always there, you just have to take the blinders off. You can't force a person to be a parent, however you can go to court and at least pursue child support for the older two. But you should also be working to support the kids you helped make. Sorry, you chose to make 2 kids with 2 different men--and you need to equally financially support those kids with those 2 men, and not expect those 2 men to support those kids financially 100%. You then went on to bring 2 more kids into the world. Well let me toss on you what most family courts toss onto men who try to use that excuse to pay lesser child support to previous kids they made--the courts tell them you are responsible for the first two kids you made first, and no one told you to go on to make more kids without being able to support the ones you already had. I know it sounds harsh, but you made this predicament you are in, and you don't get pity for it. You made bad choices twice that resulted in 2 kids, so pursue child support for them, and make sure you can equally support them, you shouldn't be rewarded with 100% support from these men because you made bad choices take equal responsibility for those choices. You are right your present husband shouldn't have to fully support your first two kids--you should be helping so you should get an adequate job to help alleviate your present husband's stress, and if you already have a job that's great--then pursue child support through the courts and let them grace the pay of the first two fathers.

The best way i can tell it is most men don't mature as fast as women, it is proven. i don't have any childeren by another all 3 of mine are from one man. and as far as we know he has none. only thing i can say for sure is don't hide who there real father is from them. my mom has hide that from my sister claming this one man to be her father and he was not. after 13 years it finally came out that he was not her dad (thank god) but our mom will not tell her or anyone who her dad is.

i dunno

It's all about the hormones, sweety. They want to do it with many women as they can and don't want to take responsibilities for the consequences that comes with it.

A real father always care about his kids and wife all the time, a useless father never care about his family.

Well it is not all men I have a great Husband we where very young when we had our kids and they are now 15 and 13 and we are still going strong but your new husband knew you had 2 kids when he married you so it must not bother him he must be a great man. As for the other 2 have you taken them to court to try and get support from them? Both mine and my husband father are not in the picture either. If you can make it without the other to do it I love my stepfather as if he is my own dad and your kids can and might do the same.And maybe they are better off without there real father which if he pays support he will have the option to see them.

Commitment and responsibilities. Men like these just don't have the balls to raise a child. If the fathers of your 2 oldest helps you with the finances you're still compelled wo give him his rights as a father, but in your situation you can deny him everything. I'd say you're still lucky because your husband loves your 2 oldest children, you have your kids and they love you, their biological fathers doesn't matter anymore.

I know how you feel My elder 4's dad went in 1995 stuck around occaisionally to 1999 and then stopped completely not a sign a call a card or nothing. I don't understand either they bond with them then like a switch it goes off. I agree it is not fair that new partners are given enough credit for the raising of non bio children.Even the child supp[ort system doesn't take it into account. Go you dads or mums raising non bio and boo to the bio sperm donors that don't care.

I honestly have no clue what drives them away, but I wouldn't go ahead and say most men. Most men don't do this, just some of them.