can you criticize your relative on how they're raising their child?

You can criticize anyone about anything you want. The problem is what your critisizm can cause. If you want to keep your relatives as friends then you should probably avoid critisizing them but if you dont care how they feel about you then go right ahead and point out their flaws.

Foprtunatly this will be your sister in laws problem when the little girl gets older. To help out the child though when you watch her you could try to get her to do things for herself, let her be grown up at your house. Go to the store and you and her buy a cup of her own that she can drink her milk with and let her use it when she is with you. Little things like this will make her independent and she may just like it enough to insist on it at home too. When she asks for you to do things for her tell her she is a big girl and make her do it. So what she throws a fit. This is because she knows you will get up and do it for her. Good Luck

I wish, I see a lot of how parents are neglecting in the parenting skills. I mean as a kids if I was told not to do something I did not do it for I knew there would be hell to pay if I broke the boundry. I just want to slap some parents these days.

Your sister in law needs another child or two to take up her time. She is lavishing all her attention on this one child who will grow up to expect everything to be handed to her on a platter. Perhaps she feels guilty about leaving her child in care while she works.Is the child in childcare or is she looked after by a relative.The reason I ask is this,does the child carry on like a spoiled brat when she is in care or does she only do it to her mother because her mother will react and give in to her demands. A sister is easy to talk to but a sister in law can be a bit of a problem. Have you tried talking to your brother about it surely he will listen to another family member.

I think you should say something. The child sounds to dependent, even for a four year old. I don't think I was that dependendent at four and I'm physically disabled! It could have serious emotional problems for her daughter later on.

im really sorry to hear how your sister in law treats your niece. i always believe that discipline is the number one aspect parents must instill. its like education. i dont have the right to say what is supposed to be done and what is not because i dont have a child myself. but based on what i have read, i think that is is a BIG NO- NO for spoiling children, letting them have it their way because if you continue doing that, then they might never respect their parents at all. they will grow up fearing no one. and thats bad. because once they grow up, go to high school or college, they will be independent and they might do things parents might regret in the near future. please tell your sister in law its not too late though. the kid is just 4 years old if you start showing her that there is someone higher than her/ her parents, then she might change. and nothing is wrong with giving punishments. its one way of instilling discpline. hope my discussion would be helpful! take care!

Personally, I think you should stay out of it. You may not agree with your sister-in-law's parenting techniques, but she's the parent in this situation, so you have to stand back and let her be the parent, even if it means watching her make mistakes.

Now days kids think they should own the world and have everything go their way.But I remind mine all the time that they have to work for what they want and they need to know what responsibility is.I don't spoil my kids I make them earn what they want.

I take it that shes an only child. Most parents can be guilty of too much love for their children to the point that they want to do everything for their child. Sometimes I find myself in the same situation but I try to correct myself immediately before I start spoiling my 5 year old boy. Maybe your sister in laws feels somewhat guilty of something so she tries to fill it up by giving to her daughter's demands. My advice : if you are close to your sister in law maybe you could talk to her casually about your observations and see how she would react. Who knows, maybe she will open up because she truly needs someone to talk to or some help in raising your niece.

I think there is othing wrong with it if you do it in a tactful manner. Tell her about a discussion you read on here or an article you read that talked about how people raise their children and the mistakes they make. You are free to have your opinion and if you let your sister-in-law know your thoughts without really criticizing her then it should be okay. You have to be careful though because parents are very defensive when it comes to accepting criticism about themselves or their children. Be creative in the ways you let her know things and do it like you are just infomring her about things you have learned and not like you are really saying that she needs to change. I think it is important for her to hear these things because she is not doing her child any good by letting her get away with things like that. Being a parent is hard and it is the parents job to teach the child the proper things so the child can grow up to be an independent, responsible, helpful, respectful, honest, intelligent, happy adult.

Now only the way is make her independent......I just want to say always to be +ve. JAB JAGO TAB SAVERA...if she now know that she has scolded her life.then she can also make her life tooo.... She shud try once more to make her independent,....for child nothig is impossible to learn

i can see trouble brewing. if this child is not "disciplined" she will face trouble as she enters the real world. being her aunt u have responsibility, so do talk with ur sis in law.it is important.

That's a hard descicion. I think it's best to confront siblings with the help of other siblings and or parent. B/c if you confront her by yourself, it will be easiest to cut you out of her life, but if you can enlist the help of other family members, especially those whom have had children, you may be more successful. Either way, it's not going to go over well, but she'll eventually get over it, and hopefully take your advice.. Unless she wants a bratty controlling teenager, she should change her actions.

Well your sister in law will have to handle her child in the future. You probably should not say too much since she will throw it in your face that you don't know since you don't have a child or a child that age. I will cause too much friction in your family. The most I would suggest you do is when you are in the presnce of the child and the mother you talk to her as a 4 year old child and make sure she understands that you are not going to give in to her requests and demands at 4 years old. That you are the adult in the situation. Just don't be too mean about it. Sooner or later when you are around the child, byherself; she will not act that way in front of you casue she knows that you aren't going to take it.

I know some people who make their kids rotten and then complain about it. It drives me nuts. I just tolerate it as long as my home and kids aren't being harmed or disrespected. They have the right to raise their kids how they want.

I think you have to be really careful when it comes to criticism (sp). No one wants to be told how to raise their child. It does sound as though your sister-in-law is doing a disservice to your neice though. She is almost at the age where she will be starting Kindergarten & needs to learn independance. I have a soon to be 6 year old that is still a mommy's girl. She does well in school & social situations though. She does enjoy holding my hand when we are out & loves to sit on my lap. I am fine with that because i know these days will soon be gone.

not up to the task I would suggest as every one has bad and good habits simultaneously, its just the side effects of some good habits what we call bad habits

I have had 2 daughters and I don't think tou can spoil a child with too much love and I also made foods that my children wnated so I knew they ate... I do think that a person needs to teach their child how to earn their way in life too and not just keep giving because in the long run they will always depend on you for everything...especially money...

This issue is very delicate since you are related and it is very sensitive. I am trying to think how we can help this mother so that her daughter will benefit but God how hard it is. On one side she seems to be a devoted mother, on the other she is not trying to help her daughter grow in a very demanding society. Maybe offering her a book on child development will be helpful. Maybe, you can offer this child your reinforcement every time she does things by herself, play with her and through games, we can teach a child efficient behavior. I really think that you can help if you can offer your niece some time and stimulate her curiosity and her will to do things by herself. I don't think that criticizing is helpful but offering your help by showing your niece different attitudes will be very rewarding. I wish you success Best Regards

You can but I wouldn't advise it. Maybe one thing you can do is spend constructive time with your neice and see if you can have a more positive influence on her...